Tag Archives: Twitch

September Update

It has been a very long time, and for that I’m sorry. Sometimes life gets in the way! And I’ll be blunt, I just did not want to be live or focus on creating content. We all get in those moods or feelings and honestly, for me anyways, it is a lot easier for me to NOT go live then it is to click live and not give a proper amount of energy. I owe you all that. When I click like and I just am “Not feeling it” it really creates a

September is going to be HUGE! I will be planning to bring new things Into the stream as well as bringing things back also I think we have a solid stream schedule that has worked for the most part in August that I am finally happy with it!

Stream schedule is this now:
Sunday 2.5 hours
Monday 2.5 hours
Tuesday 2.5 hours
Wednesday 2.5 hours

Time is tricky for me when having a 6 month old. Trying to get regular hours is more attainable for me. Ideally I would just like to be live 2.5 hours a night which is approximately 10 hours a week. MOST days I am on between 730pm-10pm. It really depends on when my son settles and can relax and fall asleep. Though mind you the longer he takes to fall asleep or fuss the less motivated or energize I am to stream! Which I am working on. One of my problems is that if I don’t think I can stream for the 2.5 hours I would rather cancel which I shouldn’t be. A 1.5 hour stream is better then cancelling all the time! I just need to tell me brain that! It comes from a part of me that slightly is OCD about times and things and I become obsessed with an all or nothing perspective. I shouldn’t think this way because not everyone can be there 110% of the time. Streaming can take a lot and trying to make this work with a new baby is challenging to say the least!

WE ARE BRINGING BACK ART STREAMS!!! Can you tell I’m excited?! This is one thing that I really missed. They were a chilled time to connect with YOU the viewer or reader. They will be still on Sunday, and at night as apposed to the mornings. They will be called “Set-up Success Sunday’s”. This is when we chill, I do some art live and we talk about the week ahead. Anyone is encouraged to come and tell me big plans and goals! My life is my son and family and I would like to hear yours! Got a job interview coming up? Let’s chat! Family problems got you down? Spill the beans! Excited for a wedding or arrival of a baby? I am all ears! Sunday’s are for us and setting ourselves up for success! If you just want a place to veg out and relax you are more then welcome to lurk and hang out as well too! Talking is not obligated!

Monday’s will be our typical Dead by Daylight streams. Nothing new there!

Tuesday’s we will be bringing back COMMUNITY GAMES!! I will announce this in discord when I wake up Tuesday mornings, if people would like to join they can comment,and when stream starts then I will tag them individually so they know to be ready. The only thing is we all must be on push to talk.this makes it a lot easier if multiple people are streaming at once and we arent talking over everyone either. Which can get a bit taxing!

Wednesday’s are just like Monday’s regular Dead by Daylight games!

We also will be having a community hangout on Discords Thursday evenings for anywhere from a hour to 2 hours while I edit some videos for youtube which we are also launching too! But I will talk more about that next blog.

These release days are no longer Monday’s and Thursdays but they will be Tuesday and Saturdays. With YouTube videos released every Monday and Friday guaranteed with occasional Dead by daylight content on Wednesdays if I have enough clips for a video!

Weight loss has been going well. Though as I write this on Aug 26th (few days earlier) then release date I have been majorly slacking. I am still down anywhere from 10 to 12 pounds though which is huge. I just need to do better with monitoring my calories. And continue to workout. My medium term goal is to be under 210lbs by January 1st 2021. I can do it but it will be hard! And if you want to help there is some new channel points in the stream to help stay moving! And yes there is a limit, I think if there wasn’t I would be exhausted from you guys trying to push my limits (which I appreciate!).

Though I am struggling I have a new planner coming on Wednesday which I am excited to finally be able to keep track of content and life in one place. No more re-writing things and buying new scribblers because I slip up a bit. One of my biggest things I think is structure. Having a baby and no job it is seriously hard to have structure and I think I am lacking. I need to have some sort of schedule for life as much as I can to feel some normal life. Streaming, content creating, editing, growth, life and behind the scenes. stuff like that. I want to make this being at home mom work and make some sort of an income but to do that can be quite challenging when you have to care for a child who doesn’t exactly have a schedule and even if he did it would change as usual!

Hopefully next time I am writing this I am down a few more pounds at least the ones I gained back, and have a better handle on how to do this thing we call life!

-StaySee xo

PS: Prep for some dramatic blog posts coming up!

May Overview/June Goals

May was a decent month even if the ending was a bit slacked. My hours streamed are getting up there to my goal of 40 hours per month. This is even with slacking off at the end of the May. Some stats were slightly up also. However if I was a bit more consistent then it might have been different. Schedule change is also happening. We are dropping Friday’s and moving it to Wednesday’s. This way we have all 4 stream days together and all of our off days also together too. Obviously we may still do bonus streams on Friday or Saturdays for the spooky games I play or even the podcast/talk show that I will talk about later in the blog as well! Overall I have major improvements to make however I am happy with May stream wise!

I was stupid to think I could start YouTube by June. I think it was overly ambitious however the new goal for YouTube is to do a soft launch with the blog writing streams, and in the Fall. Go full editing with montages, memories, funny clips, blog reading, podcast/talk show etc. Also, looking at commissioning an intro and outro for YouTube. I was going to wait for the fall as well, when I have a full revamp done. However why wait for the YouTube so I can fine tune it over the summer for videos to come out! These blog videos and writing should be easier to edit however clips and things I want to learn all the bells and whistles. I’m excited to hopefully be able to bring in new viewers to the channel both on YouTube as well as twitch!

A few weeks ago I had won over twitter a mindset coaching sessions with a woman named Victoria Waye. She is a Mindset Coach and has really helped with thinking outside of the box for myself and what I should be doing and directions to be taking. It’s hard to brand yourself when you aren’t sure the direction you want to take. For me I was full of ideas but there are some things that I never even thought about! We have had 2 sessions so far and I look forward to the other 2 in the coming weeks. From thinking about pushing the blogs as being a front runner to the content that I produce! It’s something that I never put much value in when I probably should have. It is something that makes me unique which is hard to see about yourself. If you want to contact her and discuss these things here is her twitter which she is super active on also: https://twitter.com/TheVictoriaWaye

An idea that I was suggested which never crossed my radar is recording the blogs being read and uploading them so say Spotify or a website called anchor for podcast. That way I can deliver the same content however just the audio so folks could listen perhaps on their drive to work, at the gym, or cleaning or whatever they feel like doing with a bit of background noise too! Something as simple as this I had no idea I could do. However I don’t personally listen to audio books, or podcasts so for me it’s just something that isn’t exactly on my mind. However I need to look a bit more into where to put these and where the most value may be. Which is nothing really but a bit of research!

More on this space, I’m thinking in July on Saturdays we start a podcast/talk show on my channel. I’m feeling Saturdays since people may work or if there is any EU people/UK people then everyone can make it as a viewer or guest since Saturday’s can be flexible time wise. Something light, funny, maybe a few drinks and just kicking it. Nothing serious (There is enough of that in the world!) I would have myself as the host (Obviously) and I would also have 5 guests, I’m thinking we use discord since that seems to be easiest. Guests would rotate each week however if some wanted to be regular that would also work! It would be Bi-Weekly since we all have lives and it might be tricky to get a lot of people together. My goal is to start this July 11th/2020.

Weight loss is something that I have struggled with doing my whole life. Sometimes I can be bang on with exercise and controlling what I eat. I am a very big emotional eater whether its happy or sad. I also am lazy obviously however I know what I need to do. Overall I would say May is Okay for this goal. I am not down any pounds. June goal is to be down 10lbs by the end. I also have set myself up with an elliptical schedule with Thursdays being a rest day, And workouts anywhere from 40-80 minutes. Neighborhood walks are kind of non existent right now because it is way to hot sometimes for the dog and baby to be just walking around. Maybe a bit at night if there is a chill day but other then that they are kind of on hold til the fall. I also have done my Calorie Counting book til the end of the month with some rewards when I hit a 10lbs weight loss goal. These are more or less just buy a new outfit, splurge on Davids Tea or things like that. No real food rewards since that would be silly. I also have to stop munching out from smoking weed. That is my biggest problem, I can do well all day and fail when I think food is greater than it is. Also changed my workouts to the evening instead of morning. Just to make it easier on my Boyfriend. He normally watches my son in the afternoon while I stream and feeds him in the mid-late afternoon and supper while I do his bottles. So this is great for me to change instead of the mornings so he was essentially watching him steady with me mixed in as well so he can have time to game or hang out instead of little pieces throughout the day. Now its more of a schedule!

Overall I am happy with how May went and I have a lot to look forward to! I want to really focus on content as well as my weight loss goals too. I know what I need to do but doing it can be super challenging. And honestly I need to stop treating/rewarding myself with junk food. I’m able to resist! I know I can!


Connecting with followers outside of streaming

Connecting with your community outside of streaming is so much more than just posting in a discord server an hour before you stream. There are many ways you can connect with your community without having to be live. That being said, you don’t have to just open all of your DM’s up in order to be connected with your community!

Social medias is a great way to connect with your followers and community. Chances are if people are connecting on those platforms they are helping your reach as well too. There are some folks who will be die hard dedicated to connecting on socials and will like/share/retweet all of your stuff! Even commenting on posts as well too. In order to really connect, (provided you dont have hundred and hundreds of people commenting) reply or like every single one of these responses! Seriously. A little interaction goes a long way. I know for me, I follow a dude from Sweden named Orb. He is one of the most connected people to his community. He connects on twitter and Instagram, he likes replies and comments back. He is able to do this and as a viewer it makes you feel important because the person you are following and interested in is showing  you are significant. Like you aren’t just a viewer to them. Not all streamers are like this but Orb is great for really showing he appreciates his viewers and community!

Discords is one of the best ways to connect with your community on AND off streams. Whether you are commenting in the morning or commenting after you are live, or even just jumping in to conversations it is a great way to bring the community together even by having viewers and viewers chatting together! the more active a discord is and the more involved you are, the stronger the connection grows. If you create a safe space with you viewers then you will see more people want to stick around because they have made friends with the people in there. I know sometimes I cant always make streams, But I will check in their discord server in the morning, See if the streamer said anything important and connect with the community. When you really get into a community and connect they become more like family than friends. You all talk about your lives as a place to vent or talk about popular topics and the latest news. Especially if everyone is from different countries around the world too. look at the Covid Crisis, How different different places around the world are handling the situation!

Playing with viewers is a popular and easy way to build a stronger community. There are a first ways to do this successfully. You can do it by playing with subscribers first, that is something people who have an establish community do so that subscribers can have another perk. If you are smaller and growing  this might deter people from wanting to watch you and give the appearance that you are just in it for money. For me, I dont mind playing with viewers/subscribers and am actually in the process of bringing back designated days for this! However using a mic for voice communications can be the question. I know some streamers who don’t use ANY voice comms, one is for fear that a person will say something on their stream like dropping the N-bomb or whatever else. Another stream who doesn’t use voice comms but this is because they have sooooo many viewers that it could get hectic. Then there is another streamer who uses voice comms in any game possible with their viewers since most people are subscribers and know that there are some things you just don’t say. For me, I use voice comms with friends and regulars. If it is someone who is in the stream for the first time chances are I’m not going to be using voice comms just in case. Some people can be jerks and try to say things negatively over a stream.

Community days are a super fun way to get a bunch of folks together. Another thing that ties into viewer games. I have seen some streamers do them on stream and others who have done them off. This is where they just hang out in discord and play games or they stream. I would suggest, If you ware playing with a bigger streamer/partner streamer.. and you MUST stream, Then it may be wise to have your push to talk on. Nothing is more annoying then hearing someone play with a partner streamer and be talking to their couple of viewers. Have some respect! For me, if I’m playing with a few partners that i watch and do viewer games I don’t normally stream while playing with them. I want to really focus on games and have a fun time! Also, it looks SUPER annoying and cringe-y if you are playing with a partner/much bigger streamer and you change your stream title as a touch of click bait like “Playing games with XXX” because it looks like you are using that person in order to get clicks or views on your stream.

Movie Nights is something I  offer to subscribers once a month and I’m part of a community that also does them once a month. However with Corona Virus I have seen people also opening up to Discord Movie nights. Something I may look at getting into but I’m not entirely sure I was thinking about putting it up to a vote on twitter actually! This is when they use a streaming service like Kast or even discord streaming because they have upped the participants and how many can watch. I would only say don’t do this too often or it might lost it’s appeal but once a month is a great time to do it! I know some streamers mute their mics during this time (My preferred method!) and they have a text channel and then another who just has open mics/push to talk and they talk during the movie. This is another fun way and once you get into the habit you’re viewers will really enjoy and look forward to. you can even vote on different movies or subjects as well to get the community more involved!

As you can see there is many ways to connect with your community outside of streaming. Find out what works for you and look at what other channels are doing also! Do what you feel comfortable with and watch how your once divided or quiet community could become busy and exciting!


Do’s and Don’ts of Self Branding

Self branding can be something people struggle with when first starting out as a streamer. Why? Because they don’t know where to begin! Do they want to be a Just Chatting streamer, a game streamer, Mature or Family Friendly Streamer. There are so many directions that one can take in this that it can be overwhelming when trying to figure out who YOU want to be! Hell, Myself it took a while to really begin to start to establish who I wanted to be. When I first started streaming it was directly off my PS4 and I just started playing. I didn’t know or think there was any type of direction that I wanted to go until I was graduating to streaming from my PS4 via capture card and then continuing all the way to PC.

Having a direction when streaming can help you in feeling a bit more relaxed (In my opinion!). Knowing where you want to go and what you want to do is something that can help in growth. When I first started streaming I wanted to be a gaming streamer. I wanted to eventually have a web cam and then I wanted to grow no games. At this point I knew very little about just chatting streams but now as I am learning more and more about streaming I slowly want to introduce myself to bringing more of the laid back style of just chatting instead of the fast paced FPS games or what not. I wanted to be friendly and welcoming to new people but like I am in real life I wanted to make sure that I didn’t take crap from anyone and was treated nice. I don’t put up with stuff in the real world like bullies and what not I wasn’t going to do it in the virtual one either. That also being said, I knew I didn’t want to be someone who showed a lot of cleavage on stream either. Not that there is anything wrong with that but a) I lack confidence to show that much skin on stream let alone to anyone and b) I was in a committed relationship and I couldn’t bring myself to do that because I felt like I was betraying my boyfriend who i was in a very committed relationship with. It was just not the image that I wanted to have for who I am or becoming as a streamer.

Having a family friendly stream vs a mature audience stream can be tricky to navigate. For me, I wanted to have a mature audience. I swear WAY too much and knew that when I was gaming I did not want to be babysitting anyone. Mind you now that I have my son I will eventually have to be more careful with swearing (Unless I switch my schedule now to an evening one when the little fella sleeps a lot better!) but overall I do not want to be a family friendly stream. I know there are streamers who do run a family friendly stream and I respect that. They want to have a safe space and want to welcome people from all different ages. For me, I want to watch streams who are mature. With a kid especially I feel like I will see more than enough kids programs that I will need an escape with actual adults. That being said if someone comes into my chat (Which Yes, I do have the mature audience filter on too!) and they say that they are under 18 I simply say we don’t talk about ages in my channel and move on.

Stick with it! As hard as it might be. Whatever you want to do for self branding stick with it and test it out for a while. Establishing who you are and what you want to represent will take time and energy as well as dedication as well too. Rome wasn’t built in a day you know! Sure, For my situation I could have easily went and shown a bit of skin and maybe I would have had it a bit better on growth or whatever else but I didn’t want to do that and stayed true to myself. If it doesn’t work then cross that bridge when you get to it!

What if you want a change? Is there a right way or a wrong way to do this? This was something that really stuck out to me from AshniChrist’s youtube video. If you want to change change slow enough that your viewers do not notice and fast enough that they stay interested. If you do this too slowly you may lose viewers because they don’t want to stick around waiting and waiting. And if you want to do it slow enough that it is not a major change. If you consider yourself a family friendly stream which primarily plays FPS games and suddenly you switch to a MOBA and are mature content, that is quite the change between! You may lose people who were once dedicated along the way because you have done a legit 180 for content.

Lastly, BE CONSISTENT! If you are one way on your stream, say Family Friendly, but on Twitter you are 18+ and on instagram you are pg-13 then you will find you will get a bunch of people in the wrong places at the wrong times due to all the  mixed messages you are sending. If you are going to be family friendly, do that across all of your social medias. And if you choose to have different sides of your brand then separate them. There is a streamer who mains Dead by Daylight who is family friendly. He welcomes anyone and everyone and is super wholesome. It would be a bit whacked though if you were to click on his twitter link to see a bunch of nearly nudes or F-bombs around in tweets.

Whatever you want to do or decide to do, There is no right or wrong way to brand who YOU are! As long as you aren’t being fake I think anything goes in my eyes!


Should I play the newest game?

With games like Valorant on the Horizon it can be quite the task to pick a game. We touch base on this before with the one game vs variety streaming, and even recently on the choosing a game to play, but this is going to focus more on the newest games and whether or not you want to play them immediately when they come out or old off for a while to play them. So often you hear the bad side to streaming the newest game when the larger streamers are also going to be playing them. It can be a tug of war with thoughts when trying to decide if you should play it or wait out the craze. Here are some pros and cons and some questions you should ask yourself before committing to playing this or put it on hold for now!

Do I choose the newest and latest game?

Choosing a new game like Valorant when it comes out can be a bit damaging if you haven’t properly grown a following. Why? Because 9/10 times every single partnered/big streamer is playing these games. And most of the times this is in part due to the fact that gaming company’s reach out (Or streamers reach out to the company’s) and they are essentially “hired” to play this. This is why you might see the #Ad or even #Sponsored in their title and are playing it for a certain period of time. They may even play it a few days after the release as well too depending on how their contract/obligation is. This could be playing so many hours per day til/after release or even just the initial day it is released as well too.

Should this mean you shouldn’t play the game? Of course not! If you want to play the newest game of course you should. However, to go in to this and expect growth could be a bit disheartening though since you are in fact competing with the biggest streamers more often than not when a new game releases. If you think that you will enjoy the game don’t let that stop you from playing it.

What if I want to play the newest and latest game?

I would strongly recommend that if you decide to play the newest and latest games to PLAN PLAN PLAN! The more you plan (In my opinion) will ultimately show in the end of your stream whether it was a success or not. Ask around too, Maybe others were going to play it themselves so they wont be available to be in chat. Therefore you might be playing the game to nobody (In case that matters to you). If you make this an exciting thing then people might even want to hold off watching someone else to watch you! I know for myself, I have held off watching a streamer play a game that looks interesting to me because I might not have the money to get it at release but I do want to play through it at some point without having everything spoiled and no surprises for myself. I also know that I have been in some chats as a viewer and have seen different people ask the streamer if they are planning to play through a game because they think it would be really entertaining to them and they don’t want to miss it. Which as a streamer, Is a great feeling to know that people are excited to see how YOU will play a game through!

Getting on the hype?

Don’t wait too long! That would be something I would say to anyone. Look at when Fortnite came out and how drastically things have changes as well with building and things. If you are falling in love with a game I would totally say start from the beginning. I have seen a few streamers who are bigger not start playing Fortnite til the learning curve was so steep that they were left behind. If you see a new game or you want to jump on the latest fad don’t hesitate! Take this opportunity to get on the bandwagon and become an expert! Look at people like Myth, Before he played a game called Paragon (I think!) which was shut down. Fortnite came around and he started to play that full time and really became an expert to the point he was showing the actual pros tricks when they would cross in lobbies! Same with Ninja, As far as I know he didn’t wait til a few months after Fortnite came out. He started playing with it and really dedicated himself to the game and now he is one of the biggest Fortnite streamers on the planet!

How can I make this a big event?

Well that\s easy! Make something on your social media. If you are able to, make a picture and spread it across twitter. Have a timer in your chat that lets them know how excited you are and plan on streaming it as well. If you want to use a small giveaway or something as well (Though set it up to reward your regulars not bring in people  only there to win something). Make an announcement on your discord so everyone is getting hyped about it as well too. If it is a multi player game then you are also able to connect with fellow friends and streamers and try out some multi streams. This can be a great way to connect across a few communities and work on building a connection with others if you want to.

Playing the newest game doesn’t have to be hard or rough for smaller streamers. It just takes some planning and some hard work into it though. Look at all of the big streamers, some get new overlays, some get new alerts or sounds, they make a big production about a hyped up game they are able to play. Look at yourself regardless of viewers in the same way and I’m sure you may also find some success too!


420, A stoned blog post!

As many of you know, I do smoke weed. Call me a hypocrite though as I’m writing this on April 13th and I am in fact not stoned as it is 12:30pm. I don’t normally smoke during the day through the week Monday-Friday only in the evenings and I do write these out to be scheduled in order to save time! Not to mention, if I schedule them I am able to not miss out on a week too! Being a new mom takes responsibility and I cannot be high all day every day like I was when before I was pregnant. Before I had become pregnant with my son and weed became legal in Canada I was smoking weed any chance I got! After school, wake and bake on the weekend, and all night and day long! It was easy when you didn’t have to look after a tiny human that’s for sure! Here is my take on weed, and if it is legal where you are, enjoy a toke too!

I first started smoking weed when I was 16 years old. The second time I smoked it in fact, I nearly got caught! I was over at a friends house and his uncle was the husband to my moms friend. Needless to say he basically called us out and I had to lie to my mom saying that I was not smoking weed at all. And after that I just had to be more careful when it came to getting high! I probably did a lot of stupid things too though. My best friend and I used to say we would go to the store. We never did. We would bring wrappers of candy and use those and tell my parents or hers that we ate the candy on the way home. What we actually did was go to the woods up from my house along the path and smoke weed. Rain or shine we were there, no joke! Not to mention the countless hot boxes and Jamaican rains that have been done over the years also too!

Now as most think, or seen to think, weed is as you would expect anything to be that is “drug” related to be controversial. Here where I live, in Canada, Weed is legal everywhere as long as you are of age in the province where you live. Though there is debate to raise the age to 21 due to the fact that weed effects the growing brain and in teenagers the brain does not stop growing til you are above the age of 20 or so. Which I can understand why it is such a taboo subject.

As someone who does smoke weed regularly except for the odd times when I would go a month or two without smoking (And of course, I never smoked when I became pregnant with my son!) I am a firm believer that weed should be treated just as alcohol. You should be of age and you also should be responsible as well. No driving or whatever you wouldn’t do while drinking. Responsibility is key when consuming these type of things as well too. I think as far as Canada is there seems to be not a MAJOR rise in weed related offenses in the eyes of the law as well. Which I think is a good thing.

For me personally, I prefer smoking weed over drinking. Not that there is anything wrong with either if done in moderation of course however for some reason smoking a joint has just appealed to me way more then getting drunk off my face. Maybe it is because |I feel like I am in more control when I smoke weed (Don’t let that confuse you with thinking that I feel like I am invincible!). The way I see it is this. If I smoke a joint at 4pm, Relax and hang out, by 10pm or so I should be good enough to go anywhere if I wanted to, ie maybe drive home from a friends or maybe to the store or whatever. If I was to start drinking at 4pm I really can only have ONE drink and that means basically nothing because I wont be able to catch a buzz, and anything more I wont risk at all due to the fact if I am pulled over and asked to take a roadside sobriety test then I could be in very deep crap!

That being said, I wasn’t always making smart decisions. When I was a teenager (Like most!) I would drive around with friends as we smoked weed. I never had my license but would be a trusted shot gun comfort. Sure looking back that was an extremely stupid thing to do. Was there a lot of Red Flag” moments? Of course there was! Would I change it? Possibly. But it was fun none the less and I would probably be upset if my own kid was doing the same thing when he grows older! As my mom always said, Do as I say not as I do.

Weed was probably something that helped me to connect with a group of people not to mention when I was a teenager it probably helped me stay sane while I was in an abusive relationship too. Though weed was also one of the many reasons we fought it also was something I used to connect with friends and what not too.

I guess what I am trying to say is don’t be stupid if you wish to smoke weed. Enjoy the art of what it is to get high and embrace the journey you are about to take and create some memories! And if you don’t agree with that, It is okay too!

Before I end this wacky and fun to write blog post Ill leave you with this, when I was in college there was a girl who had a saying on her Facebook page. And I firmly believe it. “Weed, For making the bad times good, And the good times better!”


An Open Letter to Twitch

Firstly, let this be a warning that this is going to be long, emotional, and also maybe a bit personal as well too. My goal in writing this is that MAYBE some of you reading this feel the same way, and would like to start holding Twitch up to the standards that they set.

Here is my personal story from the last week about this:

I was playing DBD on my stream. I main the game, love the game whatever. Pre-game lobby I noticed a viewer in my list by the name of ***** (I wont be sharing the name, You can find it by going back through my tweets on the video that was viewed over 1.7k times last I seen). Game was against a Michael Myers. I was immersed and seen by the killer. Cool. I was then hooked. Now on MY SCREEN it appeared that this person then camped me, with Michael’s stalking so that there was no heartbeat. As I was saved they immediately came back and hooked me a second time when I gave up and was done and over with the game. When in the end game lobby (I was the first person to die I think? If not the second one to die). When I was in the end game lobby the person had their name with *****|TTV…. The same name that was in my chat THE ENTIRE GAME! I instantly banned them, And obviously while heated said they were a fucking idiot, they were extremely greasy, and if they wanted to stream snipe people, maybe use a different name so when they are in someones chat they aren’t seen so easily. Of course I was pissed that someone played the same game and was sitting in my chat. It’s a greasy move. For anyone wondering, Survivors cannot see the killers user name til AFTER the game, Killers can however see the user name of survivors.

One might ask, Well how did he know you are a streamer? My name on steam is “StaySeeJ08” however on my profile I have a streamer on twitch with my twitch link. This person directly went to my channel from looking at my profile. I was not the one who had “TTV” in my name. Now looking back, Sure I could have handled my words a bit wiser. Anyone in this situation thinks that way and reacts on emotions instead of thinking things through. It really is a crap situation when you have someone who tries to ruin a game.

Here is the kicker though, After my stream I went back to their VOD. Maybe I WAS over-reacting, Maybe they legit weren’t stream sniping and was in my chat waiting for whatever reason. Who knows. I went back to the time I checked their stream (After the game when I discovered their username) I went to the pre-lobby when we all entered in. At this point I seen this person checking profiles. Okay cool, That’s how they went to my channel, BUT while in the process of checking out my things, They felt the need to Harass me AND belittle me. They specifically said things like “I cant believe she is on a STREAM TEAM! She only has 13 subs, I have 42 subs!” and “How can she be sponsored with such little sub counts! I have way more then she does”+”I cant believe this”. At this point it’s looking like my reactions were in fact correct, Though after watching the game stream sniping can for sure be debatable. It’s not til AFTER I banned him from my channel for the suspected sniping that I continue to watch the VOD. This individual is now in voice chat with their friend where their friend asks “Do you have tits?” at some point because for some reason it is super hard to believe that someone “Like me” is on an actual stream team based on my low subs or the fact that I have a sponsor through my ORG since you know, low sub counts. Apparently I don’t provide enough for my viewers that they feel the need to comment about my weight next. The streamer whom I accused of sniping which I now know was in fact targeting me (Which was also stated on a clip on my twitter when they said “I’m not even going to lie, I targeted her this game”) made this statement “I’m supposed to kill you, That’s my job. What do you expect me to do, Suck your dick? Which I’m sure you have one under all of those rolls.” For the record. I am 7 months pregnant, so yes, I do have a roll. In fact, It is one large roll that normally kicks from time to time. He will be born end of February or beginning of March.

Now sure, I accept the fact that this individual streamer may feel heated, rightfully so, as was I. He has every right to comment on me calling him the names I did. What he doesn’t have the right to do, Is comment about my weight, Comment about my subs or viewers, or even comment about my channel. I never commented about his physical appearance, his channel, his sub counts, but for some reason this person feels the need to attack me in this way because quite frankly, there is nothing else to comment about.

As per his concerns:
” How can an e-sports player act like this? This is exactly the problem in E-sports.”
— I am not an E-Sports player. I am a content creator on a stream team which has e-sports teams for varies BR’s and different games. None of which I play or am on the team for.

“How can she get a sponsor, she only has 13 subs?”
— The sponsor seen on my profile is that of my teams. However, If you were that concerned about sponsors then you can EASILY create an email to ANY type of person you want, Elgato, Supplements, Energy drinks, etc. After doing so you can see if they will sponsor YOU and there you have it.

“I know a friend who is a pharmacist tho knows stuff and in my opinion she isn’t pregnant shes just fat, Ive seen when she sits up”
— I am due between March 7th to 11th. There is photos on my twitter, Instagram as well of the ultrasound. If it was that big of a concern you would see the photos as of recently at 30ish weeks and a year ago are very different in terms of my body. As well as twitch clips on my YouTube as well too. My body has changed a lot in the last year. And I wouldn’t change that for the world. Not that I was super skinny before my son will be born, but I am a lot bigger now with him growing, Naturally.

“She has a busy background on her cam, OMG”
— This is an art project that I started in 2019. It began with the FeelsStonedMan and continued rotating with partner and affiliates painting an emote from their channel (With their permission). This was something I did on Sundays (Which I know you can relate to since you sketch up designs for you VR things).

As for your YouTube video as well. Seems the comments are super interesting. Whoever you are talking to D’Jango Markov .. You look like a desperate person for attention comment to them as if it was me. You have seen my YouTube. I put my short clips there. No click bait. They are just there as a place holder that some day maybe Ill learn to edit. The only thing I have done is like comments and obviously down vote your video. You have sadly played yourself here by talking to someone which you seemingly respond to as if it was me. Why, On YouTube would I make a fake account to comment when I have used my public twitter, discord is also public FYI since your Friends so desperately think “There is no way to communicate since she shut that down”. You know my YouTube name why would I change it and especially to something like D’Jango which has no relation to myself? That just sounds silly. Whats pathetic is you and your friends continuously talking about it on stream and my weight. And for the record. Stats don’t mean anything. You can have a higher average viewers, higher average, (BTW the day I had 80 viewers average was when I was on front page for a fundraiser for charity. It has nothing to do with the team hosting/raiding me. Thanks) I’m not entirely sure which route you would like to take, but this whole “Comparing” each of us is something YOU have become obsessed with. Not me. Clearly something completely bothers you about my stream or my personality or my viewers or my socials if you continuously feel the need to come at me like this.

Now back to the behavior, Is this acceptable for Twitch as a company to allow happen to their broadcasters? Now mind you this individual has gathered his viewers and also reported me (Note: He was banned back in August of 2019 as well for whatever reason according to his twitter). I have also gathered mine and reported him for harassment and bullying. What has happened? Nothing. Nothing at all. Not to mention there is now a YouTube about myself extremely edited and using my stream without my consent as well too. I could blame myself since I made the 1st move to Twitter with the clips. If there is one thing, I’m not going to be harassed and bullied BEFORE THE GAME EVEN STARTED. His response when questioned on the YouTube video about not putting certain clips I had that skewed his view, was that I skewed my view of him. Touché. However, Do not claim you put “Unedited” footage into a video when you clearly edited the pre-game lobby when the hate was spewing before the game even began. For someone who seems to point to myself as “Playing a victim” card, It seems to me that the only victim(s) here are the people who haven’t truly seen/heard what you have said about me. Especially the end game lobby when the trash talk had started and I was no longer in the lobby to defend myself either. It was brought to twitter. No mention about it on streams for 3 days, make that 4 counting last nights since this person seems to mention it avery time someone in chat mentions the world “Elf sniping”. If people come in my chat, I simply say we aren’t discussing that subject and move on. However day in and day out there seems to be an obsession with this individual who comments continuously for 2-3 hours per stream about this, Not to mention having one of their viewers “lurk” my channel to see if anything is said (Which its not). If you spent half as much time on trying to focus on your own channel instead of others maybe you wouldn’t have been banned back in August of last year. Just maybe.

Which makes me want to ask the question: At which point does harassment/bullying/targeting in game bring consequences? Is there a point?

Twitch, You do a pretty HORRIBLE job at helping your platform be safe. I’m not saying that every little thing should be reported and nit picked however being on the platform for nearly 3 years the amount of abuse, targeting and harassment to all different types of people need to be addressed. From being in my friends streams who are part of the LGBTQIA+ community having to deal with hateful messages, and people of color having to see racist comments as well as both communities dealing with usernames that are SO OBVIOUS but super bizarre that some type of Twitch algorithm does not pick up on these. There is a lot of clever people as well so I wont deny that, but why is is such that the obvious names are let to slip through the cracks with people who have the ability to abuse others and belittle them based on varies reasons?

It is 2020, there HAS to be some sort of reason or way for you to adopt a system like say Overwatch, Or other games on your platform (Dead by daylight this is also at YOU!) to at least acknowledge that a report has gone through, a person will investigate and or the results of such ie: Action has been taken against *Username*, Findings unclear, Nothing has been against ToS. Sure, It will take man power but you know what it can also do, Give a few more jobs from your company to deserving people.

There is no denying that Twitch is by far the leading platform as far as viewers, streamers, unique content, and overall experience. That being said, Why are you not STRIVING to hold your content creators to the utmost highest standard? It takes outside forces for particular streamers such as law enforcement, PETA, etc, to make the first call instead of YOU. I get it. I’m not blind. These streamers have thousands of subscribers and are generating you money. Do you not think that there is someone else on the platform ready and willing to be the best person they can be to replace these people? Does a paycheck from these entertainers mean so much that they can bend the rules?

2020 is already here. The amount of controversy that has been laid out in 2019 is astounding in the world of streaming. Especially on this platform alone. You were the ones who said that We, The streamers and community wanted a clearer and respectfully precise standard for your ToS. You said that is what WE wanted. We still don’t have any clearer picture here. It’s foggy and it is completely bias sometimes as well. Sure, Every case is different. I get that, however there are some things COMPLETELY black and white that are still being ignored and unaddressed. Why do you have to wait for a controversy or a major uproar in order to do something about this. Set HIGH standards before there is a riot.

As for viewers, This little piece is for you. If “booby streamers” are that big of a problem. STOP GIVING THEM ATTENTION! Personally, I could care less if boobs are half hanging out, or if butts are being shaken. Personally, I am not comfortable doing that but if that’s how someone pays their bills who are we to judge that. If they are within ToS let them be, and if they aren’t, Stop sharing clips of them. You are only fueling their success about it. Bringing MORE people to their channels. Start fighting for real issues here. Racism, Homophobia, Sexism, Bullying, Targeting, Transphobia. I could go on with SO MANY MORE types of things that are FAR more important to fight for instead of a pair of boobs on the screen.

And with that, If you read to the end of this, Congrats. I didn’t think half the people would. This is my feelings right now. Something has to change.