Why I Don’t Believe In Birth Plans

I have a feeling before I even write this post that I may not be the only one who is of this same mindset. I feel like there are people who probably plan every last little detail and than you have the total flip side of people who do not plan a single thing out. And then some people to finish off the list who probably think about a birth plan but it never really goes that far it only goes as far as thoughts or talking it over with their partner. I am someone who kind of talked about it with my spouse however there was never really any plans in terms of the “fine details”.

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If you have been reading all along and you still are not sure what exactly a birth plan is I am here to tell you. A birth plan is just that. It is some thing you put into place for when you have a baby. Maybe a wish list of sorts. Perhaps if you have a c section you want to be asleep. Or maybe you know want the gas and no epidural. Maybe you want to save cord blood once the baby is born or you want to have an epidural. There is so many possibilities when it comes to having a birth plan from physical aids to even mental aids or the atmosphere you want too. Maybe you would like to do a water birth or you want to try different positions also. It really can depend on the person as they can be so drastically different from one birth to the next. Maybe you are a parent of multiple children and you had done something with your 1st birth that you would like changed with your 2nd or maybe you liked the way it went so you want to keep a very similar birth plan throughout different pregnancy’s.

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For my first child. I can’t say I really had a birth plan. You can read the lack there of in the blog post about that here. I basically went into the birth open minded in the sense that I wanted to not be a hero. If I needed to have medications to aid the process along I was going to take them. However spoiler alert: I was never given the chance to have an epidural with my 1st son. Everything happened so quickly that even looking back on what happened I think I was so filled with adrenaline that even if I had a birth plan.. It probably would have gone right out the window!

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My second child I still went into the birth in the same mindset. Again if you want to read the details you can check out the blog post I wrote about that birth here. Another spoiler alert: It was basically the exact opposite of my 1st birth. But I did go into it that I would not be a hero and if my body ached and I needed an epidural I was taking it. I did not want to hold off on aids to help me be comfortable if I had too much pride. That was not where I was going. If I could be more comfortable during labour I wanted to for sure take that route with number 2.

I personally can say I don’t believe in birth plans. Why is this? I strongly believe that the more you plan something out the greater chance it has to completely go hay wire and wacky. If you plan every single detail that is more and more opportunity for it to go wrong. What if you would like dimmed lights, but the room you are in does not have that opportunity. Maybe you are dead set on all natural birth but at the end of the day the pain was far greater than you ever imagined and an epidural changed your whole experience from a negative to a positive? There is so many what if’s that if you plan every single thing out you are taking a risk to be let down.

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If I was to pick anything in terms of a “birth” plan for myself the only things I can think of is number 1. A private room. This was something that my partner specifically paid for through insurance. If you paid whatever extra per month you could ensure this happens. Obviously it also depends heavily on the hospital and if it was available which lucky for us was. A big part of our not planned birth plan was going with the flow. I wanted to go into the births open minded. As I mentioned multiple times before, I was not going to be a hero. If I needed drugs or medical interventions like an epidural I was going to take it. I did not want to not take it and hope I can power through the pain. Not that I think child birth is a bad experience but I was not going to suffer for pride or for bragging rights either. You can see how having no birth plans in either of my births probably helped things go with the flow.

I understand that there is some people in the world that would like to be in complete control of how things go. That is okay for them. Giving birth is one of the most special things a person can go through. You are literally bringing another human into this life. Though it is important to point out the more specific the plans the more opportunity it has to backfire and have something happen that is out of the plan.

I will also state too, even the best and thought out plans can still have surprises. Never did I ever expect to be here saying I had a c section for my 2nd child but here we are. And we had no idea he had turned and was breech until we were actually in labour and they checked on an ultrasound!

Did you decide to have a birth plan, and did it turn out the way you expected?

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