Tag Archives: update reflection

Soooo Ready for September – Update

To say this summer was a flop is a MAJOR understatement. And by major I mean it was a total flop. It didn’t help that it started with Covid and ended with having to put our family dog down. Needless to say though I am ready for a new season and new adventures.

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Our summer started off horrible with covid hitting out home. After dodging it for over 2 years including spending the beginning in Quebec where cases were super rampant, we got it. It literally kicked my butt. My two boys also had it and they were just having a really bad cold. I talk about this more in details in upcoming blogs, Be sure to look for those as it really isnt as big of a walk in a park as everyone makes it sound like. It completely sucked.

Another hard thing that happened this summer was that we had to put our Sheldon down, our family duck tolling retriever. I’m not sure if I was writing about it in previous updates however if you are a follower on any social media you would know that there is a bit of health issues that started the beginning of this year. We had tests done and what not but even medications at one point were not helping. As sucky as it was we made a promise to ourselves that we would never keep any animal alive just to have them alive. He just was not getting better and the medications he was on should have been causing some weight gain when he was steadily losing it. We made the tough decision that obviously something was wrong and to spend thousands to have the same outcome, he was not an young dog by any means either. It was by far one of the hardest things that we have ever had to go through but we feel like it was the right decision considering near the end the vet had said that she thought it was cancer and there basically is no coming back from that at his age and the surgery’s that would be needed and whatever interventions as well too. We will get another dog but it wont be any time soon though that is for sure.

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Streaming has been rocky, I had suck high hopes for the summer to be able to stream some more than usual but here we are and I’m giving up on the 5 days a week streaming. We are back to focusing on the 3 days a week and getting back to consistency. When I want to do more I can totally do bonus streams but for the time being right now it is just going to be 3 days. I swear every single time I want to stream more though something ALWAYS pops up and I am unable to do it for some silly reason and this summer was no exception to that also.

I started another weight loss challenge in mid August, well the 8th of it. I feel a lot better about this than previous ones. I really need to control the munching late at night though so starting next week well, when I have the check in I will be keeping better track of calorie counting though because the over eating is not helping anyone. I have also recently have started back at the elliptical which is a huge win for me and I am really happy about that too! I kind of was sitting at the computer one day and was like wow I am going to find the cord to plug it in, and there you have it! It worked great and I was so happy to finally be able to get back to it. Why have one if you don’t use it!

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I HAVE 2 BOOKS PUBLISHED! I did not think they would be done as fast as they are but I have two books out. The Darkness which is explained here, and The Light is explained here. Both are poetry collections with 100 poems, and I still have a third that is also coming out in the near future. I am so happy and excited to share them and feedback I have been getting has been tremendous. I am so happy though to be able to have this chapter opening. I have a few blogs talking about my methods and what not on how I could get not one, not two but three books published this year!

And lastly, in a little over a week I will officially be married, after being with the same person for nearly 12 years it was about time after 2 kids, and hopefully a third that we actually settle down and make it paperwork official. I will have a blog coming up about that also too. It is pretty low key and super low maintenance. It is kind of more of an elopement but kind of not? There is literally 9 people including myself and spouse and our two kids. To the point that we have to actually buy a package! It includes 10 digital photos on an online album so like that is pretty cool too! I am pretty excited but also not super excited because we didn’t want it to be a big deal either. Eventually maybe on an anniversary we will do something bigger like a mock wedding and reception but right now our focus is on the kids and home renovations to set us up for the winter and hopefully saving money.

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Overall though, The summer was nothing like I expected it to be, but then again what in life is. Nothing. I just am still bummed about our dog being sick. I had this feeling back in April but hearing and having to actually go through it. No one ever talks about having to put down a pet because they literally are members of the family and do everything together. People also forget I find that Sheldon was around long before we had kids and he was a huge part of me feeling safe when I was home alone. I hope the fall has some more pleasant surprises but time will tell wont it!

Feb 2022 Update

Where do I even start! I feel like the past month flew by and also crawled by for so many reasons. Let me break it down and explain!

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Streaming is going pretty decent! Of scheduled streams I only missed one I think. I even did one or two smaller streams too. My only issue is some streams have sometimes been an hour and a half. I need to try my best to get to 3 hour streams. If I can get close to that, I feel pretty confident that I will be able to get back to where I was streaming before the Move. Funny enough, the last time that I remotely streamed close to the hours that I am reaching this Month was in May of last year! Every other month after that I have less than 15 hours which is insane for me to think about! But when you look at the big picture even in the summer I didn’t have anything to stream with for 5 or 6 weeks since we had no furniture delivered. You can read the blog about that here.

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Weight loss has been a struggle. There is no denying that. You can read more details about my journey for weight loss every Thursday in my Self Care Thursday. Basically my biggest issue is over eating and munching on junk food when I decide to smoke weed. It sucks. I am stuck in a vicious cycle. I am hoping though that I will be able to finally break it though. My end goal for February is to be under 235lbs. This will be a weight loss of about 10lbs. I think it will be totally possible for me. All I need to do is be super aware and stop munching in the moment. I have lost weight before I can do it again! I just need to put my foot down and really work hard. One adjustment I am also doing is trying my best NOT to eat after 7pm. Only indulging in a sort of drink. Working out is sporadic also depending on the day but I am okay with that. It just depends if my kids are asleep at the same time if I have a half an hour to kill for my workout DvDs.

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Writing is also in a great light. I have decided to switch subjects. Previously I had wanted to do collections of short stories from 8000 to 10000 words. Horror types with about 5 stories per book. Instead I am reaching back to my junior high skills and writing poetry! Id like to write 3 books, well collections of poems and publish them. I think editing will be easy, a lot easier anyways than my stories. I can do them relatively quick. And I can publish them to start making money. For some reason I am ITCHING to have some sort of income coming in. Then I can start and work more on my longer ideas. The goal is to publish one in Aug, Oct and Dec of this year unless I do them before I will adjust the release dates. I think this is a great way for me to start and I am really looking forward to seeing how this journey goes.

Crafting is also going decently too. I really need to get a hanging lamp for the corner of my living room though as it can be hard for me to sew though at night when there is not strong lighting. I did try a Facebook ad though there was some positive results I may need to try it again in the future when I see more results and what not. Though I want crafting to be successful it is very scary to me because ultimately I cannot make people buy things just like writing. My goal for February and hopefully into March is schedule posts for my art twitter and Facebook page as well. This would be huge to keeping the page active I think and people seeing different things. I also need to share it to different groups too that will help folks see the page also.

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Overall I think I have a great month ahead. I am so happy with how things are going and slowly introducing things back into my life. Adjusting to 2 kids is a bit of a juggling act for a little while. Regardless I am so thankful that I am able to still enjoy many things that I did before I started to have kids. I cannot wait to see what the next month is going to bring and what I can achieve. I have been really trying to not push myself too hard so that I fall back to not doing much of what I love because I know at the end of the day touching base on things like crafting or gaming or even writing it is moments of self care that is important to my mental health.

Here is to another month ahead to crush whatever goals you have in whatever area of your life! I know that I have a feeling this might be a great year ahead if this month was any indicator and I cannot wait to see where mine takes me!

32nd Birthday Reflection

I cant believe that I am here doing this again, if I’m not wrong here, this is the 3rd time I am writing a birthday reflection! Starting with my 30th birthday one and than my 31st last year. Here we are again! So much has happened that I am still feeling like I am floating on cloud nine and this is all a dream. I am so fortunate to be able to have so much in my life that I honestly have no idea where to start. I guess there is really no right or wrong reason so let’s begin!

One of the most incredible things I can say is this past year I upgraded from being a mom of one to a mom of two! That being said, Both of my son’s are under 2. Which I think may speak a bit more to myself and how insane my partner and I are! I know this is going to sound super cliche but there are very real moments that I look at my two little guys and just tear up that I have been given the opportunity to be their Mom. Especially with Felix and how we needed to have a C Section with him it really tested me in so many ways. Even though the birth was nothing like my partner and I had dreamed of, I am glad with our decision. It is so hard to believe that we are a family of 4 now. And to think in the next year we will be trying again for our 3rd and final child (Unless it turns out to be twins and we have 2 more children that is, which obviously would be a major shock to us!). There is so much to talk about since becoming a Mom that I honestly have nearly no idea where to start. It is such an incredible feeling especially since my oldest is now to the point where he will give real kisses and real squeeze hugs. His affection towards myself and his dad and people whom he loves in his life is nothing short of amazing. And the love he shows for his little brother is adorable! He is still nervous of this new little human here (And of course there are moments of jealousy) but he is also so gentle and kind to him. And curious indeed also!

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Moving home was also an equally exciting highlight for us too. I am so happy to be close to my parents and Nanny. And back in a place that speaks English also. Being home while my brother has also moved home is nice. All of my siblings are in the same province again for the first time in 7 years. I am also thankful to have our own home again and not worrying about renting anymore either. With the crazy housing market of 2021 which I write more details about here, there was a very real fear that we may not get a home of our own. Not to mention, the fact we will not be moving again and can make this home into our own is also incredible too. There is so many ideas that we can chip away at. I have even started a list of “Wishes” that as we get a few extra dollars here and there we can begin to upgrade and make this house our forever home.

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There is so many things that I would like to achieve in the next year also. From saving money to get my boys a swing set for the back yard, To just saving money in general. And then making money also would be great. I feel like I can be unstoppable if I wanted to. For the last little bit I will be the first to admit I have been a little willy nilly on spending. I haven’t exactly been able to save or had the motivation to. However something clicked after the holidays and having 2 children instead of 1 that I really want to set an example and give them everything that I may not have had growing up. Isn’t that what most parents strive for?

And lastly, being 32 this year I really would like to hammer down and lose weight and get healthy. Having 2 boys I will be no doubt chasing around, I do not want to become winded from playing with them for 5 minutes. This is something that is so important to me that I am even starting a weekly blog post, which will be pretty open and honest to almost hold myself accountable to all of you here. It will not only focus on my physical well being but my mental aspect too. I want to really try to get into a better weight for myself and for my family too. it is time that I really try to do this since I am not getting any younger!

Overall, as many hiccups we have had from having to wait 5 weeks for our things, to having some family members become hostile due to our stance on vaccines, there really is not a whole lot of negative I can say about the past year. I know this year coming up with both of my boys will be one of the best yet! Not to mention I am so very excited to see how the house transforms and becomes more and more ours! Oh yeah, and I am equally as excited to be able to hopefully make a small income all the while being a stay at home mom too!!