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I swear Ill never learn.  This weekend started with such high hopes and it became diminished by weed and poor judgement.

I was seeing the lowest numbers on the scale and one weekend was all it took to totally go backwards. I think I will be okay this weekend and by the time this releases I may be back under 240 pounds again. Though the lowest I seen in recent days has been 237lbs which I totally thought let’s eat everything possible because I did a good job. As much as I want to say that the numbers are not a huge motivator they are. I also need to stop rewarding myself with food. For some dumb reason I think I can food should be the motivator when I need to do other things.

One of the hardest parts of this is creating new habits and trying to say goodbye to the old ones. I ate far too much on the weekend which rolled over to Monday. You would think with the sore stomach, and a backup system I have I would learn. For those few days that I over ate I am now paying for it after I get back on track. That is wildly insane to me.  And what is worse is that I obviously still haven’t learned yet to cut that out. Maybe this week will be better and I wont totally screw myself over.

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Working out has been decent. I have slacked in the past week in terms of actually doing it due to the fact I’m pretty I hurt my hip from bring my youngest to bed for an hour which I never want to do ever but some mornings it just is far too early! And then my shoulder was extremely wonky after and that was weird. I have been doing these walk at home videos with Leslie Sansone. They have been going well. I love how easy going they are and accessible too since I watch them on YouTube. Sometimes it is challenging due to the fact one or both kids may be fussy and not napping but I am really pleased overall with how I have been doing those videos pretty regularly.

One of my favorite items to use to workout and get the heart pumping is a skipping rope. Pair this with hand weights for a mini workout when you are a bit crunched for time!

Now fast forward to the last 2 weeks in March. I am kind of looking forward to it but also not. My spouse is away next week from Monday to Friday and the following week from Monday to Thursday. Typically if he is gone like that I barely if at all smoke weed. Which I indent to keep up! It could really effect my binging on food if I’m not smoking weed. I intent to use that time to really hammer down on habits and even blog writing. As well as poetry. I am nearly 2/3rd of the way finished my 3 books.  Once I am done it will be time to organize my poems and prep them for typing as well as edit them roughly on paper. I am so dedicated to making this work it is a little bit insane! But I am so looking forward to it though. I want to really again get a jump on blogs due to the fact my partner is going on parental also for May ,June and July. For those 3 months I will be streaming a bit more often than I normally would. Keeping the same Mon and Fri days but also introducing a Tuesday and Thursday day time stream in the afternoon just for something to do also.

One shake that I found to actually fill me up is slim fast shakes, they are a great meal replacement with a sweet kick added too. When I am needed an added bonus for energy I tend to reach for these Nuun energy tablets.

Overall I think I can be close to my 230lb weight loss goal. We are just over half way through the month and the numbers that I have seen on the scale are re-assuring for sure. I just need to stop feeding my victories with treats and instead maybe reflect and drink some water!!