Category Archives: Uncategorized

Pregnancy 16 Week Update

Where do I even begin! I feel like this pregnancy if some what going fast and some what going slow. It is hard to believe that the next update we will have together will be the official half way point! And I will be also in transition between Quebec and Nova Scotia and hopefully figuring out things with my doctor in Nova Scotia to be able to be referred to get a new labor and delivery doctor to follow me. My goal is to hopefully get everything set up so that it goes as seamless as possible and I wont be behind on blood work or anything else that may be needed.

My energy levels seem to be going back to somewhat normal levels thankfully. That is huge for me already being a Mom to a 15 month old and having to chase him around. I find myself not needing to nap as much as I did before and also not having to lay down as often. The bathroom breaks at night seem to also be a little less depending if I find it is a good idea to drink a liter of water an hour before bed or not. As for nausea, I sometimes feel an upset stomach if my boyfriend makes something gross like fish or whatever and I find myself feeling yucky. Still only ever got sick the one time which I think is honestly a blessing!

I also have gotten blood work previously which you may or may not know I hate doing. The first I think is the hardest due to the fact they take so much. And I am a wimp so I would have loved to have my boyfriend there holding my hand but that wasn’t the case. He was watching our son and I went on my own. I did not cry which was good and I never even looked either. For some reason giving blood stresses me out. Maybe because I never had to do it will I was about 20. And then when I did it again after I was pregnant with my son. Lucky would be an understatement or maybe that asthma does not usually require blood work!

I also had a doctors appointment as well! Which I am super happy about and hopeful to be possibly getting an ultrasound before the big move. It was a pretty standard appointment.

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We talked about my blood work results which are great. The only thing was I am not immune to something called the “5e maladie”. The doctor was not sure what the translation in English was however it is when a child in particular gets a fever or rash for no apparent reason (not like a teething rash or whatever) if I was to get the same thing it could really effect the baby inside. Which would not be good and result in complications. Other than that everything was great. She asked if I would like to have a final check up before I moved which I said yes to! I am getting more blood-work just after 16 weeks and that would be for the 2nd part of my “Trisomy 21” screening. This is to check for abnormalities such as down syndrome and what not. With my son our numbers were extremely low so I am hoping for the same results here.

Next we did a quick check up on me. Checked my breathing and heart rate. My blood pressure was already checked by a nurse when I arrived and that was great. Which obviously was good for me considering the stress of moving and what not! And of course we listened to the heartbeat again which was also great. I still wish my boyfriend would be allowed to go to appointments but it just doesn’t make sense with the pandemic and if that was the case I am sure so many people who didn’t need to be there would be.

And lastly, my doctor put in a request for a 19 week or so ultrasound. Normally this would be done after 21 weeks but I am excited to hopefully have it before. With my son the placenta was in the front so movements were not felt as easily and part of the placenta was covering the cervix. I would like to obviously know this and not have to wait til maybe 25 weeks or more when things happen in Halifax after the move. Oh, and for sure. I would also LOVE to know the gender of the baby too! My boyfriend and I are thinking about names but not entirely til we find out the gender though. It overall would be a great feeling to have this done before we move so we know everything so far is alright!

Over all I am relieved that it went well and cannot wait to hear about an ultrasound. It will be great. I am so happy that I am feeling more like myself again also. That alone can be really exhausting when I am tired and feeling different. Especially with the move coming up I am relieved to be able to finally have energy to get things done. I haven’t felt overwhelmed by anything thankfully I have a partner who can take care of a lot of things on his own. I am starting to plan and pack what we all need to bring for the car and a few nights in a hotel but other than that things are alright! I wont be waiting til the last minute that is for sure! Be on the look out for moving blogs as they come up! I talk a bit about that here.

Oh, and it is probably time we start with belly updates so here is the 16 week one!

Im sure at the 20 week update I will be equally as big by then! I should be in transition to the new house but I will still do my best to update you all on time! It just might be a bit challenging if I have to do it all on a Tablet!

4 Tips on How I Use Twitter Efficiently!

Using social media can seem like a huge black hole when it comes to filling time. I know believe me. If you are anything like me when you are scrolling, you then put your phone down, almost immediately to pick it back up though and then you do the same scrolling again. Only to find out that obviously nothing has happened in the last 15 seconds since you last closed the app. Or you start scrolling and scrolling only to realize that you are reading the same amount of garbage you just read before and nothing is changing in the process you just see the same things recycled. Well here is some tips you may be looking for on how to use Twitter more efficiently so you can spend as little time as possible on there instead of mindlessly browsing.

Scheduling tweets is something i need to do more and it has become super simple with the help of the desktop app for Twitter. Right now in the process of moving I am HOPING that I will be able to schedule tweets for the next few months up until September when I have settled things and are back into a routine. I schedule blog posts, I even schedule funny comments that I have saved to my drafts (More on that next!) and I have also scheduled funny questions and words of wisdom too. I will mention if you want o schedule a poll there is no ability to do that at this point in time however they are useful if you want to find more out. Scheduling tweets can make it seem like you are more active than you are. I like doing this on weekends especially since I don’t stream on weekends I find myself slacking completely on posting things in order to seem like I am around when I am not. You can always give the illusion that you are around even if you are taking time away for whatever reason.

Drafts are your friend. I never really started using drafts until the last year. I love using drafts especially if I am thinking of some good tweets but it might be too late or I think they will flop or not fit the mood of my timeline. I simply type it out and save it into the drafts to use at a later date. Sometimes it could be about something happening in my own life, Maybe its something happening at night and I don’t feel like posting it. Or maybe it even is something that popped up in my mind but I already posted a tweet that has been doing good traction wise and I don’t want to over lap. Saving drafts are huge in order to keep content going. Sometimes you can even save a tweet that you may have posted, but instead of it getting some sort of traction it didn’t do well and you would like to save it for a later date. A key thing to remember is maybe a tweet you posted might not have gotten a reaction you wanted, or less than you expected, that does not mean the tweet was bad or the information not useful. You can save it and use it later when you might find better success!

Comment on posts you enjoy and try to let networking or building relationships happen naturally. If you are commenting on posts to start an argument that you have zero interest or do not agree with you will find it extremely challenging to grow or have any success what so ever online. Genuinely showing interest in content you enjoy and vice versa will help in making your experience online and using your time wisely. Why comment on issues you hate or have no desire to really understand or follow? Another valuable piece of this would be if you are tired of seeing certain terms, mute them! If you have no interest in politics or anything like that, mute the terms. If you do not want to see something about a particular country, mute it. There is no point keeping somethings on your timeline when you really do not want to be part of it. Maybe you followed a fan club for some actor you liked and that is all that pops up now and you are tired of seeing it. Well, mute the phrases or sayings you are tired of seeing also! And this includes muting or blocking individual people to. Maybe there is someone who always pops up on your tweets just to argue with you. Save yourself the headache and just mute or block them so you no longer see them anywhere. This is YOUR experience not anyone else’s and if it is effecting you get rid or it from your timeline!

Stay active and be random! Don’t worry about posting things that might not flow with your timeline. Remember that the most times you are able to showcase your personal side of likes and dislikes or even opinions that will be the best way to gain traction on followers. People like to hear opinions whether or not they agree or disagree with them. The more personal you can be with someone the better you will find yourself on Twitter. This doesn’t mean sharing your credit scores or personal address this just means shedding some light about yourself to others who think the same also too. When you are more personal with people they seem to flock to you, however don’t always post negative things or struggles, keep it semi-light humored and fun!

So there you have it, That is my 4 simple tips in order to enjoy your Twitter experience. I know for myself I need to practice some of these things a bit more but I will say, when I do, I feel a whole lot better about myself. You do not need to spend every waking moment online to have a great experience or some growth. Leave some time away from the screen and share moments with the world that you think they would also enjoy too!

Do you practice any of these tips?
Is there anything new you would like to add too?

Let me know in the comments below I would love to hear them!

– Stacey

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Moving Stress, Buying in Canada 2021

As you may or may not know, Canada seems to be in a major housing crisis. There are homes going as much as 50-100k above asking in regular old neighborhoods. Trying to find a place to live has been nothing but stressful. Not to mention there are many folks who are being evicted due to their landlords selling the properties they have been living in. And apartments around the city, specifically Halifax are going anywhere from 1000+ for a one bedroom. So once someone is essentially left homeless or scrambling they now are finding it hard to find an affordable solution. Especially this is difficult if you have animals as well too.

If you are familiar with buying a house, it really was not this hard when we first bought a home about 8 years ago. You would simply find a home that you think you would like, and put an offer in. The sellers would than come back with a counter offer if they were not fond of your offer. And you would go until the home was inspected and everything fine and than you would be done and over with. There was no usual waiting period or holding offers it was pretty straight forward. Sure, if you were not fast enough there is a chance of losing the home to someone who maybe had finances in order quicker or perhaps you would lost it to someone who did put in a better offer but more likely than not you were pretty good on a home once you picked one you would like.

Fast forward to now, things are completely backwards. You no longer have time to wait and put in an offer. A home is listed on say a Thursday, and by Monday you will know if you are an accepted offer. There is a very short window for viewings and then they typically say close at a specific time and hold offers until 3-8 hours later. After that you will find out if you have won essentially. What you may or may not know is that there could be anywhere from 5-15+ people who are also putting an offer on the same home. Therefore you can no longer ask a few thousands above asking, You need to literally put your highest mac on the table and hope it is the best. You also have no idea what others put on their offers so essentially you are almost for sure going to be over paying for a home. It is a flex on who has the deepest pockets. In Nova Scotia more specifically there has been a lot of out of province buyers from Ontario and Quebec who are purchasing homes leaving Nova Scotians stranded with no where to live.

Essentially the new way of buying a home is in my opinion barbaric. Until the province or bank or whoever steps in to make it “fair” for everyone I don’t think it will let up anytime soon. You have to ask yourself what you are willing to pay for a home. Mortgage rates are so low due to this boom in housing for sale that they even do a stress test where they jump the rates up to 6% in order to see if you can survive the increase of you will end up having to sell again before the bank takes your home. Even homes that are outside of the city of Halifax that are normally going for asking are going anywhere from 60-110k over. What is weird is that there is no rhyme or reason as to what homes will go above asking or what will go slightly above asking. There is specific areas that are more expensive to buy in, ie: Directly downtown or close, Dartmouth or even Sackville which is super weird and never seen before. If the home is renovated you can nearly guarantee that they will be going at least 75k above the asking price. Some homes that we thought would go way above asking didn’t, others that we thought would go a bit above asking flew up to 100k+.

Another tactic that you hopefully know and do not fall for is that there are homes listed far under asking price. This is because they want to see more offers and where people are normally familiar with the market they are likely to be putting more into their offers. The best advice you can do is not to go over your max. Regardless of if the house is worth it or not. Do not go over the max you can do or you risk losing financing because the house is not worth what you paid. Another bit of advice would also be to make sure you have a proper down payment when it comes to buying a home. If not you risk losing financing as well based on the debt ratio that you will have when paying for mortgage payments etc.

And a final piece of advice, If you are able to on whatever website you use to look at homes, favorite ones you like and watch prices. There have been times that I see homes go from sale, to pending, back to sale and they have an increased price. Which suggests that the offers that the seller initially had gotten were too low and instead of putting the house for sale at the price they wanted to they did this in hopes to get more bites which didn’t work.

So where does that leave us? Well, I will be going more in depth about the journey that we took when it came to buying a house. As of the time of writing this we have had an accepted offer, and against all odds it was below asking price. There is a lot of work that will need to be done however we have to quarantine for 2 weeks upon arriving and we will hopefully get the painting done a lot before. I can tell you it is extremely disheartening and stressful to be putting offers on homes (That to be frank, are just not worth that much to begin with) And have them be 30-60k over asking and be denied.

Regardless we have out inspection tomorrow, I will hopefully have an update in the near future once the sale of this home is finalized and I will write up the amount of homes that we put offers on, the prices, and the bids to give you a better idea how crazy the market is. More of the math side of things. And hopefully I can share that the sale of the house is for sure!

Have you sold a home in Canada in this crazy market?
Are you looking to buy a home in Canada?

Let me know in the comments below and hopefully this can help you in your house hunting journey too!

– Stacey

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Pregnancy 12 Week Update

It happened.
I officially threw up from morning sickness.

I know. One would say that I am extremely lucky to have gone so far without throwing up but it happened. It was a Thursday and why do I remember this? Because the day before was Wednesday and I had cancelled a stream due to having an upset stomach. I thought I was going to be sick but I just had poop pains instead and had a bit of the poops. Then the next day I felt the same pains and thought okay, same thing? Wrong. I had the watery mouth which I know is as gross as it sounds, I took a tums assuming it was heartburn and MAYBE it would be cured magically. I was wrong. Before I even had finished the tums I was in the bathroom getting sick. I still am trying to say the reason for this was due to the fact that I had 2 cans of rootbeer that day, I know maybe too much but honestly I could not help myself. It was a warm day and they were going down way too good!

Okay, Now that the gross part is out of the way, I also had my first official doctors appointment. This went well! I had a new doctor since the one I had with my son was off on maternity leave herself. The new doctor was super understanding as I explained the situation where I would be moving and was hoping to have things done if I could before I moved. There was nothing super fancy in terms of check up either since the first appointment is typically 30minutes or so. This is so they go over everything basic with you and answer any questions that you might have, which I did not have a whole lot considering that I legit had a baby a year ago so I feel like things were pretty standard. I was given Advil for preventative measures against pre-clampsia. Which had changed from one tablet the previous year when I was pregnant with my son. Now it is 2 that you take nightly. I was put on this because towards the end of the pregnancy with my son I had a slight high blood pressure and they wanted to be sure it didn’t happen. Even though I know it probably was the best since the moving stress could inherently cause high blood pressure. Lastly at the appointment we listened for the heartbeat! Which we found as well! She listened to the heartbeat with the fetal Doppler for a few moments and the heartbeat was nice and strong! If she was unable to find it she would have used the portable ultrasound to find the baby but she was able to find it with this.

My next appointment will consist of a physical I guess? That is what she said anyways. That is not for another few weeks though, Maybe not for the 16 week checkup but after that I should know. I’m not entirely sure what a physical checkup really consists of but I can only assume that it has to do with you know, all of myself being checked over. The only reason why it wasn’t done on the first appointment is because it normally is so long to begin with that the physical would be even longer.

I also had to get what I dreaded planned. This was scheduling blood work in for myself. This is to test for the trisomy 21 (Down syndrome and other things of this nature) as well as regular blood work and urine samples. Thankfully I scheduled this a bit in advance since it can take a bit to get an appointment due to the fact that with covid appointments are scattered and getting one first thing in the morning can be challenging.

Overall after my bout of sickness and feeling tired I find myself not so tired anymore. I think my energy is starting to come around or it could be the fact we did in fact BUY A HOME! And will be moving back home in less than 2 months time too. This is a huge relief and one of the biggest worries for us. The other things will all fall into place. I find my appetite is not as sensitive either where smells aren’t as strong and bothering to me however there are some weird smells happening. I couldn’t tell you if I was really craving anything a whole lot. If anything I would say rainbow twizzlers, I know weird right? And maybe Sour Cream and Bacon chips. Other than that I haven’t had anything super strange strike me as delicious .. Yet!

My goals now are to also start going for morning walks with my son in order to become more active. I might even keep track of days we go for walks. I think this could be helpful to decompress after thinking about everything there is to do with moving to quarantine and whatever else is happening around that is our of our control. I am also being very mindful about my weight since with my son I started at 235 lbs and went up as high as 270-275lbs. This pregnancy I started at 240lbs and I would rather not go above 260 if I can help it. Obviously I am trying to really make sure that I eat enough to be healthy and I am not dieting but I would like to really incorporate walking into my daily routine as well. I did this a bit with my son however fell off the wagon and with the heat I think this could be a great way to get into the daily activities that we have in the morning before it gets too hot. And will be good to also follow as well once we move and begin to explore our new neighborhood!

Are you on a second pregnancy?
How were you feeling after 12 weeks?

Let me know in the comments below, even if it was a loved one you knew that was pregnant!

– Stacey

Pregnancy 8 week update

Since this is the first update of pregnancy and there will be a combined 8 weeks in the first one with following up every 4 weeks I figure I might as well do this since the first 8 weeks really can go either way. Also, Don’t forget that chances are you are reading this I am a bit over 8 weeks and in fact over 12 weeks. But where we are keeping this under wraps it will be released though a little bit after we make the announcement to the world about our second bundle of joy!

The first 4 weeks
They were kind of crazy. This was the first cycle we tried to get pregnant with number 2. I mentioned this in the announcement blog as well. I knew something was up this time. I dont know if it was because I was more in tune with what pregnancy was like or maybe it was just that I was legit pregnant last year too. I felt like my boobs were again bigger like I had gained some weight. It really is hard to explain. Before when this happened I figured it was due to weight gain and nothing more. This time I knew I wasn’t OVERLY eating that much and it seemed weird.
My shoulder also had this weird thing happen. I was doing an art stream and suddenly it started to hurt. I had to actually stop the stream about an hour in to painting it hurt that bad! It was so weird I even went to grab a shower and then took some Advil to see if i was going to be alright. I told my partner about it and the first thing he said was maybe we were pregnant! Since something happened strange with Vincent though I thought it was to do with my foot not my shoulder though.
As for food aversions or anything it still is far too early at this point. I did however cut up chicken for the slow cooker yesterday and it was weird smelling however I had no idea if it was in my head or not so I had to get the boyfriend to smell it when he came home. It smelled fine to him though! As for nausea though I don’t think I have felt anything yet as still 4 weeks is very early to really have a whole lot happening.
I do however feel more cramps though then I did before. Maybe because I JUST had my son about a year ago so my body is still in the mindset of pregnancy however I feel it more. I wouldn’t say painful or anything but annoying for sure. It does come and go that’s for sure. And I already have been starting to go to the bathroom through over night.. That is not something that I have really looked forward to with a future pregnancy.
I also am not very tired as of yet but if the opportunity comes up I don’t mind trying to squeeze in a nap though if need be!

OK, where do I start with weeks 4-8. It has been a roller coaster to say the least! Maybe I am just thankful that when I was pregnant with my son things were so easy going but this time around I feel like it is nearly the opposite.

I had a scare for spotting (prep for incoming too much information!) And booked an appointment with an on call doctor. My first actual doctors appointment is on May 3rd at about 10 weeks and 2 days and I felt this couldn’t wait. What happened was I had gone to the bathroom and strained a bit to go number 2 (I told you to prep!) When I wiped I had noticed an amount of spotting that looked scary to me as I had none with my son. Nothing like this anyways. I had gone to the appointment and she has said that it appears that I had the spotting from my cervix and not the baby which was a relief.

She had also booked me for an early ultrasound as well which i had gone to right after 7 weeks to check. Apparently a bottle of water is not enough so they had to do a vaginal ultrasound which is as awkward as it sounds. And they shown everything was okay. Or at least I assume it was because if it wasn’t they would have said something I would think.

For the most part I would say I still am a bit lucky. I am feeling way more tired then when I was pregnant with my son. I’m not sure if its because I am chasing him around or if it is because this pregnancy is different. I also have been having major food aversions. With my son I wanted to eat eat eat and this this baby sometimes thinking about certain foods makes me feel like I need to be sick. The nausea is a bit more then I thought it would be but as I mentioned before maybe it is because I had such a good first pregnancy that this one just seems like a lot more symptoms. I am thankful that I am not extremely sick or my son might be chilling watching Blues Clues while I lay on the couch. I do try to nap every chance I get when my boyfriend is home. Or if he has a long day I try to nap when my son naps and it does help.

Other than that I am super curious about if this baby will be another boy or if it will be a girl. I know having a girl would be great but another boy would also be great too. Healthy is best. I know boy boyfriend is hoping for a girl that is for sure!

Regardless we are happy to find out the gender and continue this parenthood journey in expanding out family! And even better, this baby will be born in Nova Scotia around my family!

– Stacey

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May Update 2021

Here we go again, Another update! I cannot believe we are here and there is SO MUCH news coming up for May that I can hardly contain myself to be able to hold the secrets a bit longer.

Number one, It is OFFICIAL! WE ARE MOVING BACK HOME! We received the official email and have started the house hunting. I don’t want to go into too much details as this will be a blog post that is upcoming in the future about how crazy the housing market and slanted it will be as well and not to mention stressful losing bids on houses that are listed within your price range and then you are losing bids to offers that are between 50-100k over asking. Actually insane. But there will be more details and how unfair that is later this month!

I still an buzzing with excitement that in the next 2ish or so months we will be headed back home with a new home. The only bummer is that currently Covid cases are exploding in Nova Scotia due to the fact that they had visitors from Ontario (Where cases are still in the thousands even with extreme lockdown measures) and they did not self isolate and were with folks from Nova Scotia. This causes a huge community spread to have cases go up when they had gone weeks or months without any single cases also too. I am hoping that we can purchase the home before hand and have my parents stock it up with some food, and if not that they will probably have to drop some off on the doorstep for us and wait til we are done to visit. Though at that point I will be so happy that we are back in my home province a 2 week wait seems to be great. I also hope that during this time I can find paint colors and have my sister pick up some cans of paint so we can spend the time painting our home and getting it just right since we will have time to kill while being isolated inside. Regardless I am still looking forward to being able to adjust and relax and be around my family again.

The big news that is coming up would be announced in about 2 weeks as well. That will be awesome when the time comes and I cannot wait to share with you as well too. It legit is killing me not to say anything however I wanted to wait til the time is right to share it and it is creeping up slowly but surely too!

Another thing that I have been excited about is slowly gutting the basement and throwing things away. I have been chipping away at de-cluttering and getting rid of things we no longer use however I will be majorly scheduling days this week and hopefully be able to get a lot of the basement done this month so that it can be prepped for moving. I want to really do this for May so that we can relax and take it easy for the time between that and moving. Thankfully we won’t be packing anything or unpacking but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to make everything okay and ensure that things arent in their right place before the move. As hard as it can be for me to get rid of objects and things we no longer need I don’t want to bring everything we no longer use to the new house. I want it to be kind of a fresh start so that we can have a lot of space. Not to mention now that we have a child and hopefully more in the future the amount of things we will have for them will probably grow and grow and grow. And I do not want to see all of the things we have continue to grow and grow and grow along the way. I think it will also help us to feel a lot better when we move to not have a lot of weight around as well that we have to get rid of.

Another thing that I have to do is really schedule myself. I think for April and with the upcoming move I wanted to do more. Stream more, write more, and that was a lot of added pressure to myself which I slacked and didn’t do as much as I wanted to which then made me feel upset with myself. For the month of May and going forward I am going to try to stick to just my normal streaming days, which is Monday, Wednesday, and Friday as well too. I don’t want to try to focus on adding extra streams and schedule them in. If they happen they happen. But I want to make sure I don’t miss days I typically stream on though. I also need to really schedule in days where I write and focus on finishing my book that is nearly done as well as doing some artwork and what not as well too. I think that will be great and hopefully planing will do a lot for keeping me on track with my goals.

If you have stuck with me this long through this update THANK YOU! It is people like you that make me want to continue to blog and update you all with life and all the tips and tricks that I see happening though. There is so much going to be coming and going in the next few months honestly these blogs might be making me have a sliver or normalcy since it keeps me sane and able to write out my thoughts too. There will be a lot of blogs upcoming as I prep for the move and hopefully I can write enough to pump them out a few extra times per week instead of just 2x too.

What is your update for May?
How was April and how was any goals you may have had?
Did you achieve them of fall short like myself?

Let me know in the comments below! I cannot wait to hear all about it.

– Stacey

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When will the Gun Violence stop?

Before I really go in to this I want people to know that No, I am not American. I am writing this as an opinion post and I am writing this as a Canadian. Will my opinion be invalid based on where I live? Maybe. But as a Canadian the amount of mass shootings and gun violence are typically few and far between when compared to our neighbors in the south. Why is this? I honestly have no idea.

The volume of violence and more specifically gun violence in the United States are what seem to be a weekly occurrence. Why is this? I guess you could argue the point of it being so easy to obtain a fire arm in the USA. Here in Canada I know you have to go through pretty standard permits and get proper licenses in order to even purchase a fire arm and even than I do believe you do need some type of training. At the time of writing this I am 31 years old, and I could probably count on one hand the amount of people I know who own guns and they are mainly for hunting. I don’t think I could even tell you if a friend of a friend owns a firearm for protection in their homes. Not to mention also, when you see there is gun violence in Canada more often than not it has to do with gangs or some type of feud happenings it rarely is a senseless act against random bystanders.

The fear I think when it comes to being in America is totally valid. With so many folks owning or obtaining weapons such as automatic riffles or hand guns it seems to be a “Whose is going to win” scenario. If everyone has a weapon and you are the only one on your block who doesn’t have one. Are you really adequately able to protect your family at all? Not likely because the chances of the intruder having a weapon is a lot higher. Americans have the right to bare arms especially when it comes to protecting themselves or their families. Some states even have conceal and carry and others you must be able to visibly see a weapons that you are carrying. None the less the fear that you might be shot somewhere at some point during the day seems to be insane to think about if you are near an area that regularly see’s this type of violence. Particularly in states like Colorado even where it seems every other year there is a major event happening to do with random shootings.

How does this happen? I’m not really sure that I can answer it. I think that it will be quite the odd question for me to even answer since I am not a citizen of America. I will say before anyone mentions it. Video games, entertainment, movies or television shows are not the reasons why these things happen. More often than not they are mentally ill people who think this is the only way they can put things “right with the world”.

Let’s swing by Canada for a second. Last year there was one of the most violent shootings in Canada’s history happening right in my home province of Nova Scotia. A man dressed like a police officer and painted his vehicle, a retired police car, to look real and went on a rampage across the province shooting anyone and everyone he came in contact with. And because the province did not issue a major bulletin lives were lost that may have been saved had they knew. This guy was mentally ill and might I add a white male before anyone says this was an act of terrorism or anything relating to someone who is of a different race. No country is immune to any type of violence that is for sure.

What will it take to stop gun violence particularly in the United States? I’m not entirely sure or that either. There could be a bunch of reasons like stricter laws on how to obtain firearms, stricter rules to even get a license to begin with or limiting sales in major retailers. The truth is though, If someone is mentally ill and they want to get a gun chances are they will find a way whether it be legally or illegally. I don’t think there is any way to stop them. It might be more difficult for them to obtain one but at the end of the day unless you are keeping an eye on them it will be hard to do.

Why is this normal? Maybe because as someone looking down at America or any country that has this amount of violence especially with fire arms it seems to happen so often that people seem to be de-sensitized to it. I know as a child we talked about schools being put into lock down where as this is a regular occurrence in America to learn how to handle an active shooter situation. Similar to fire drills and tornado warnings. Will it ever become not normal for people? Maybe if it drastically took a turn and wasn’t as known. Only time will tell for that.

And again, as a Canadian, does it really matter to me whether or not there is violence in another country? Not particularly. It does not effect my every day life. But it still doesn’t mean I don’t get any less sad thinking about the mindless acts of violence that is happening towards every day people like myself. Seeing any loss of human life is going to make someone sad, and I cant imagine seeing this type of stuff on the news daily either. That would be completely depressing also too.

Hope this wasn’t too much rambling for anyone, just my thoughts on what has been happening..

Do you think there is any way to stop or at least curb the gun violence in your country (if any)?

Let me know in the comments below.

– Stacey

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Why You Should Try Online Dating (At Least Once!)

Before I begin, I want to make it clear this is mostly talking about the pre-tinder days. I am sure that they all apply though the same, since I assume each dating app or site all function basically the same way. It is just a matter of trying to apply this to another spot. The site that I once used was called Plenty of Fish which I am sure is still up, however how popular it is I really don’t know since you can do everything you want on a website simply on your phone.

I was about 16 when I first tried to dabble in the online dating scene. I never admitted it to my parents though because they would never be too happy. Not to mention if I remember correctly you had to be over the age of 18 in order to even sign up which I was not. I could have even been a bit older like 17 or so but I know I was not just 18 that is a fact. When I went online the first time I wanted to meet people and be a bit risky. I never was interested in guys from my school and they weren’t interested in me. I had to go to different spots in order to meet different people. I smoked weed and wanted the person I was dating to also smoke weed. I wanted them to have their own place and also for them to smoke cigarettes too since I also smoked those. I really had no standards what so ever I just knew I wanted to have some typical “bad boy” to be my boyfriend. I had absolutely nothing in regards to standards or how I wanted to be treated either. And low and behold I got exactly that. A person who treated me like garbage, was a couch surfer and didn’t even work half the time just mooched off the government for whatever reason too. He was by far the worst relationship I will probably ever been in during my entire life.

You would think this would scare me off of dating. I was now 20 and still thought I would go back online. When I talked about it with my friends they all would make jokes about how the only thing they even encountered there was people who were only looking for sex would be there and everyone was creeps. No one ever talked about how they found someone they wanted to be in a relationship with. I would like to think the second time that I went on that site I was more mature and actually had standards for myself. I knew after coming out of a relationship that resembled garbage I wanted to have very high standards. I wanted to find someone who had a job, and I mean not just a little job, Like a career. I wanted them to have a vehicle not because I didn’t but because I knew they would be able to come to me instead of me always taking the bus. I also wanted them to have a place and not one with roommates or anything. Call it what you wanted but this was what I thought I deserved so I made sure that was what I found.

How I meant my currently boyfriend was on the same site, Plenty of Fish. He had just moved to Halifax in the August and we had met I believe end of September or early October. He had his own apartment and a car, and he worked for the government. I feel incredibly lucky to have met him when I did I feel like someone would have scooped him up. Dating him was weird at first since he paid for meals and movies, he picked me up and treated me to different things. It was a nice change of pace from the previous a-hole I was with before. Something I always have remembered is that when I asked him what made him interested in my profile I had something along the lines of “I have a job, I don’t need your money and I wont be giving you mine” because I was basically supporting my ex while he sat on his butt milking the government for whatever money he could get.

Now as I mentioned before, I never was dating during the tinder or whatever apps are out there. However I feel like this applies to all of the dating helpers across the board. Dating apps and websites are just what you want them to be. They are tools in meeting someone and they are something that if you go in to it looking for a one night stand chances are that is what you would find. For me if someone was creepy or weird I simply blocked them so contact was done and I would move on to the next person. I went into online dating twice. First time standards low and found a piece of poop type of a guy. Second time I went in with high standards and here i am with the man 10 years later with a few pets and our son. If you are looking for a relationship then chances are you can actually find one.

Some tips I would suggest:
– Be honest and upfront. If you want kids or marriage, say it. If you don’t want either or only one of them, say it. When we started dating as any relationship we were pretty much on board with what we wanted in life.
– Don’t keep the website or app if you want this to be a serious relationship. When my boyfriend and I were getting serious and official we both de-activated our accounts at the same time together to show we were over it. If you are serious you wont need to have that still, You can always get it back and it kind of shows you are closing that online dating scene door and looking forward.
– Don’t waste time on “Maybe’s”, If someone doesn’t know what they want chances are you won’t help them get there.
– If possible, Do a video chat before meeting. Mind you I never met or seen my current boyfriend before we met in person. But as a general rule this was something we followed. And in the very least, chat on the phone first. That way you can at least hear different tones and what not.
– Have your guard up against cat-fishing people. If they are asking for money or you to pay things. Decline and block. Don’t let them get close or it will only end in hurt.
– As a no brainer, ALWAYS meet in a public place when having meetings, Don’t meet in shady parts of town and make sure it is a place where there will be a lot of traffic so you aren’t stuck, And in the same line, tell someone what you are doing in case something happens too!

Hopefully this helps!

And how have you met your significant other?
Was it online?
Was it in person?

Let me know in the comments below!


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Working with Adults with Disabilities

As mentioned before, this was my last real job before becoming a mom or even moving to a new province where I didn’t know the language to work. This is by far one if the most rewarding and stressful jobs in my entire life. Here is how I got started and maybe you can decide if this is a career path you wish to take!

I got started in this job because a family friend was doing it. More specifically she ws my old babysitter. When she was young she was in the hospital at the same time as my older sister (who sadly passed away from her illness). Growing up she used to baby sit my siblings and I. She then moved a bit away for college and to live for years. In school she had taken child and youth. It was at a community college which was nice for me not having to spend so much money in university also too. I went to where she lived in a town called Truro about 45 minutes from Halifax and did some test drive program. This was where I could see if the human services side of school (the part before the Child and Youth concentration) was for me. Taking this you could go a bunch of different routes. You could do occupational therapist, child and youth, corrections officer, and many more related to helping others. I like the idea that the pay was above minimum wage by a bit and as challenging as it was it seemed like a job you never got bored of either.

I went to school. My first year human services I stayed in the dorms and went that route and my stupid abusive boyfriend nearly helped derail my life, had so generously decided to help me blow my whole line of credit which was supposed to help with my second year. So after living there for 1 year I moved back home.and finished my concentration in child and youth there.

When I had started in with working with adults who have disabilities it was more or less to gain some sort of experience working with populations at risk. In Halifax there really wasn’t a lot of child and youth jobs and a lot wanted you to have some sort of an “in” so to speak. Know someone, did placement there or whatever you want to think of. Working with adults who have challenges in different aspects of their lives is close enough in the human services field that you can kind of do both but by doing this job I would need what is called 7 core competencies. This was paid training of 7 specific courses by the company that hired me and after I had these I was ready to go.

I never thought the job would be so challenging. Aside from being a mom, this has to be one of the hardest jobs I have ever done. You can walk in and have a day that runs so smoothly you feel like you are dreaming or you can have a day where it is so off the rails you feel like you are free falling. You can be hit or punched or kicked by someone having a bad day. The key for me was remembering that they aren’t necessarily targeting you, they just are lashing out and you are the 1st person available. Then the medications are insane for some of the people from sleeping pills, anti-psychotic medications, bi-polar capsules, and whatever else you have. Some people were upwards of 30 pills a day to help balance out their moods and feelings to help them “feel” normal. Which again is a huge responsibility. Thankfully there is teams around to help that know all of the Ins and outs so you aren’t flopping around like a fish out of water. Not to mention you also have to assist with bathing them, dressing, sometimes bringing them to work. Lets not forget the food preparations and meal making also! And most times you also are doing the housework from laundry and sweeping and mopping also (unless it was a bigger group home of 6 or more people which hopefully have a housekeeper to do this during the week). I started as a house keeper and worked my way up to a counselor assistant.

Though not every job has the best circumstances and things. A major con and a solid reason why I wont be going back to this career anytime soon would be the shift work. starting in a field like this you start off at the bottom of the list. Chances are people.who have seniority in an agency will have the Monday to Friday and day time hours. For me starting off I would need to start at the bottom working most likely 2+ weekends per month as well as evenings. And I just am not ready to do that especially with children and it being the exact opposite schedule as my partner. The only way I would work this is if I got a job at a workplace that hires adults with disabilities. Those jobs are typically Monday to Friday and holidays off as well as day hours. Another con is if someone calls in sick chances are you will be stuck as a lot of people wont cover the shifts. This sucks when you are stuck working nearly 24 plus hours straight.

If you can get past this the pay is pretty decent even when starting out. For me it was nearly 3 or 4 dollars above the minimum wage due to being in the health sector. This helped to pay for bills and things as well too. It helped me save money and pay my debt from college off too. It is also probably one of the most rewarding jobs that I have ever had. It makes you realize the little things that may seem so big to us are really very small to someone with a disability who has overcome more in a day then most in a lifetime. They deal with discrimination and obstacles that I wouldn’t wish on anyone. Not to mention the fact they have to have help for their entire life to ensure their safety and that may be challenging for the strongest of people. They overcome so many challenges daily that we often fake things for granted. The job and the value you have in someones life is huge. And for that alone I would recommend anyone who has this desire or drive to do so.

The question I ask myself is, would I ever go back to this type of work? As of now, no. It would entirely depend on where I am in life and if the right opportunity had to arise. I would have to have the right schedule and something a bit flexible to work with my growing family. And if everything worked out I would consider it. Even still the job is very demanding physically and mentally, and with a family and children, they will be coming first for a very very long time!

Do you have a job you enjoy?
How did you come to deciding that as a career?

Let me know your thoughts in the comments below!!

– Stacey

(Mailed in an envelope so you can use it to send a message to a loved one!)
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Weight Loss Wednesday #4 – Feeling refreshed even struggling!

If you have been following my journeys at all you will see that I am in the process of trying to lose weight. AS anyone knows it is a struggle and you can see the beginning of my struggles right here. Losing weight is hard for anyone.

It is no surprise that I am struggling. For what reason I don’t know. With my son’s birthday yesterday obviously there was snacks and things and I hope that by writing this I can get back on track. I have been working a lot on trying to not stress about misses I might have in my schedule. That is a major reason why I try to restart my calorie counting books and things. I am the worst when it comes to being my own worst enemy. When I screw things up I am still holding it over my head for a while and its not a good thing at all.

I have been trying my best to cut back on smoking weed. Though I don’t think I am doing a whole lot I try not to smoke AT LEAST 3-4 days a week when I am gaming at least. Or if I do end up smoking I will after I have gamed. This is mostly because I am super lazy when I smoke and as I mentioned before I always cut the streams short when I am smoking and I don’t want to do that. My goal is to really try to hammer out a schedule of streaming and get to it for sure.

Current weight: 242.0lbs (Right back in the beginning.. LOL)
Start weight: 242.0lbs
Measurements (The same will be used because I really haven’t lost any weight and so measurements wouldn’t be different)

Waist: 47.0 Inches ( No Change)
Hips: 54.0 Inches (Up .5 Inch)
Bust – Over – 46.0 Inches (Up .5 Inch)
– Under – 41.0 Inches (Down .5 Inch)
Thighs – Left – 30.0 Inches (Down .5 Inch)
– Right – 31.0 Inches (Up .5 Inch)
Arms – Left – 14.0 Inches (Down .5 Inch)
– Right – 14.5 Inches (Up .5 Inch)

Going forward I think it would be better for me to not stress a bit over things. I think that is one of my biggest things like anything in life we normally are our own biggest critiques. That’s not a good thing! Instead of moving past a bad day or something I hang on to it like that is the biggest thing in the world and that’s so weird and not good mentally for myself. Having a bad day does not mean that I should throw away everything I worked hard for. I know that and even saying and writing it out loud it still can be really hard to grasp. I need to stop feeding my feelings with food and take a moment to reflect in times when I would like to munch overly whether I am high or not. I notice sometimes if I am bored I will mindlessly eat which is not good either and I really need to hammer down and stopping that.

My march goal is to hopefully get under 230lbs. It will not be easy and I know it will be challenging in many ways. I need to really stop feeling sorry for myself and actually do something as hard as it may be. I know that I can do it I just need to put my mind to it! It will be great and I am looking forward to the next month!!