Before I begin, I will state this, I do know there are apps and things that you can do for this. I find that for myself personally I cannot use an app due tot he fact that I find it very “mind numbing”. Think about how many times you click to your phone, And you check the time but you only are finding yourself checking back less than 30 seconds later because you forget what time it is? That’s how I feel about when I use weight loss apps. I feel like by punching in my calories or anything it makes me not realize the power that my food has or if I have a bad day I can simply forget it. I do however use a fitbit so I use their app for sometimes monitoring my exercise since the convenience is really easy, I also tend to use it for sometimes tracking my weight. But overall I don’t typically use an app. Oh, but I have used it also if I am stuck on calories and want to find something for a new thing that I have eaten!
As you may have already guessed, By not using anything in terms of apps for tracking my calories, Yes, I do write everything in a note book. I write it down because I feel like at the end of the day it really sinks in as to what I have eaten. Sometimes Ill even write throughout the day what I have eaten and keep count of calories as the day goes on, sometimes I will keep track in my notepad in my phone and write in the calories after a few days, sometimes I will write the calories I eat on post- it and put that on the day so I can write it in my physical book. It really depends on what I am feeling but ultimately I end up writing it in the book. My biggest flaw in doing this is that when I have a few bad days, instead of reflecting and and writing down my thoughts or feelings in the day, I feel like the book is not trash. Maybe it is because I feel like when I mess up the days the book is useless and I feel like every day should be tracked perfectly. I have recently started a new book, or at least outlining the days, and I made a promise to myself I would keep it. There is over 200 pages in there and I should not be going through and re-doing book after book. And before you even ask, Yes, I do re-use the books after rotating through but I do throw them away after so many pages is gone and I feel like it is a waste. I often forget that I used to do this when I lost 30 pounds before. I just need to get back into the habit again!
As you may or may not be surprised to hear, I also don’t keep track of those macros or micros or whatever else have you. if you are familiar with my previous blog posts you will see that I do not eat nearly enough healthy foods to even bother tracking that right now. I strictly limit my calories and eat whatever I want. Mind you if I eat a chocolate bar at 9am and find myself starving at 9pm I will normally reflect on this moment and think maybe I shouldn’t have wasted those calories earlier in the day or I wouldn’t be starving now. I try to aim to eat between 1200-1500. However I do have a max of 1750 for things, Like if I eat a serving of some type of nuts for example, they are normally higher in calories but they are good for you. So instead of overeating it I typically just count that in.
I also keep track of exercise and I think that goes without saying. I typically try to do 40 minutes on my elliptical a day. I don’t see this as too much and I think it is totally reasonable. Once I get a bit of a plateau I would like to also add in some 30 minutes workout DVD’s which will be easier for me to do once my son is older as I can put him in the playpen and I am sure he will want to do this along with me. However I do not want to start that now as I feel like I could be overwhelmed and give up. I also have some small hand weights a well that I would eventually add in however that wont be anytime soon though.
I keep track now, for when I smoke weed too. I find by doing this I am more conscious about over eating especially if that is the reason why. Obviously once we become pregnant again I wont need to but til then it is helpful. I set a goal of how much I would like to smoke during the month and try to stick to that. I know I need to stop smoking so much really. But seeing it as an overview helps to see that maybe I need to cut back or take a few days off.
And lastly, but certainly not least. I have a spot for mental health and self care. Sometimes I forget and by sometimes I mean quite often I forget that I need to take some care for myself. I need to take a moment to do something for myself which I always put second in my life. It is a lot easier for me to schedule in this time because if I didn’t otherwise I wouldn’t do it. Which is why in my streams I schedule art ones. Its kind of killing 2 birds with one stone by streaming a bit more and having a creative outlet as well. Even something as simple as having a bath and watching a show or doing absolutely nothing. It helps me keep some sort of normalcy especially where I don’t work and barely leave the house due to Covid being around as well too.
If I am missing anything that I should include, Let me know!
I am always looking for ways to make my diary for exercise and healthy living better but sometimes we get stuck in a rut and are unable to see new things.
What do you keep track of if you are in the process of losing weight too
-StaySeeJ
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Tag Archives: goals
Weight Loss Wednesday #2 Jan 21st/2021-Feb 3nd/2021 [20 days]
I need to be held accountable. Simple as that.
I have decided to do so, I will be bringing you along the weight loss journey. We recently have gotten AMAZING News about moving back to my home province so that means weight loss before baby number 2. And I mean I have to hammer down NOW! I will be writing blogs every other Wednesday til about June or so when we move. Every 2 weeks I will update (with pictures!!)
Three criteria: Days I smoked weed, Days I exercised, and Days under calories (Max 1500). Along with triumphs and struggles. And updated side and front photos too. Normally I pick subjects and write about them and if they become relevant schedule them or write about a current subject as it pops up. Not this time. Chances are you are reading this blog and it was written last night. I will have photos of calendars that I will be filling out to see things easier and an overview of how I am doing. I wont be typing up what exactly I eat in a day as I do not have the time to do that but this will be a good overview for all you visual readers! Simple “X” Day’s mean that I failed at the calendar’s goals. While if I pass I will briefly fill it in. If I am under my calories I will Highlight it with a marker, if I don’t smoke weed it will be colored in, and if I exercise I will briefly write it in ie: Elliptical 40 mins, Exercise DVD, etc. and I will write a reflection on each calendar and then a brief spot after for my struggles and victories of the week!
If you are someone who is familiar with my blogs you know that I struggle with weight loss, I have most of my life and recently wrote about it too, You can read that blog here.
My low goal is to lose 30lbs before we move. Which is no over-reaching. If I lose anywhere from 30-50lbs that would be a major bonus for me. My starting weight is 242.4lbs. I know. I feel like a whale and need to take control of myself again. The goal before baby number 2 is cooking in there is under 210lbs. It is totally doable I just need to hammer down and stop eating my feelings, good and bad.
**** If some of this is repeating the new info is below, you can read the first blog post here regarding the weight loss journey!


Current Weight : 237.0lbs (DOWN 5.4lbs)
Measurements
Waist -47.0 Inches (No Change)
Hips -53.5 Inches (Down .5 Inches)
Bust – Over – 45.5 Inches (Down .5 Inches)
-Under – 41.5 INches (UP 2.0 Inches)
Thighs – Left – 30.5 Inches (No Change)
-Right – 39.5 Inches (UP .5 Inches)
Arms – Left – 14.5 Inches (UP 1.0 Inches
– Right- 14.5 Inches (No Change)
Exercise Log

Old Goal: Workout 8 out of 14 Days
10 Days worked out!
WE DID SOMETHING RIGHT!
Having completed the goal of working out I think I will probably stick to this again. I find workout is not nearly a problem for me. I put on a show on my Computer where my Elliptical is and I just go to town. I find this time to be passed faster watching a show and fully getting deep into it. Currently I am watching the Vampire Diaries which when I am done if I can find it on Amazon Prime I will hopefully be watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer for the 5th time or something. I like watching shows with female leads that have the body shape I want. I find it to be motivating when I can picture myself striving for that!
New goal: 10 out of 14 days worked out!
Under Calories

Old Goal: 10 out of 14 days Under Calories
6 Days out of 14 were under calories.
This is a struggle for me however I am confident that the next 2 weeks will be great! I will like to add that there were some days there that were JUST over 1500 calories so technically they were over but if I worked out that day and counted the calories burned from the workout I would have been safe in terms of under. However I don’t workout and add those calories in I just count calories and let the workout speak for itself. The only day I can really foresee being over calories is Valentines day since we will probably be ordering in some food however that is basically all. Maybe an added cheat day. I set a goal below but will try to be under a lot more also too!
New goal is 10 days out of 14 under calories.
Days Smoked Weed

As you can see smoking weed was a bit better. Many more no smoking days than before however I still smoked over the 4 max smoking day limit I set for myself. Thankfully for me a friend of mine and I have a little competition going for February. She won’t be drinking Wine and I wont be smoking weed. Little does she know I think she will cave before me, but don’t tell her that! So the new goal is NO weed at all for February hopefully we see lots of colors showing no weed days!
Struggles
Have been over eating. However when I do over eat the days haven’t all collided together which I am happy about. I didn’t completely self sabotage myself this time only a little bit. Smoking weed is a challenge as well and I hope by not smoking in February that will really help me to jump start my weight loss. If I can be under 225 by the end of the month or really close that will be a huge motivator in itself for me!
Victories
A major victory for me is working out. I think I am back into a steady routine now that it will really help me to keep going. I never had a problem with working out when I get in to the habit of doing it, the problem for me was food and over eating to the point my work out was just maintaining my weight it was never helping to lose it. I cannot wait to see where I am at the end of the month with no smoking weed!
Reflection
I am finally in a place where I can say I am excited about weight loss. If I can do this correctly and really stick to my guns about over eating, no weed, and working out I think February will be a fantastic month for me. My goal is to be around 225 pounds by the end or even close would be good. Then if I keep at a 10lb weight loss. End of March would be around 215 pounds and end of February would be 205 pounds. This will be huge for me before we try for a second baby and I couldn’t be happier! Here is to a kick butt month!
-StaySeeJ

I Want to Write a Book
This may or may not come as a surprise since I have in fact mentioned it before in previous blogs, in fact the most recent time was here, When I talked about my New Years Resolutions that I would like to write a book or even books. I have a few ideas that are floating around the universe that I legit have to sit down and really think of a plan. As you know I am for sure a planner. So before I even was to begin writing I would like to map out a story, plot, some twists and see where we go from there. I don’t want to just sit down and write and write and write and hope inspiration comes. I want to have a base line and hope that in the process I can add some bells and whistles and see how it goes from there.
First I would like to start with some short stories. I went and found different type of mythical creatures or monsters. Like Vampire, and Witch or Werewolves, and found different characteristics about each. And roughly wrote different stories, dark and horror type ones since I have been on a binge of these types of shows for a while. Id like them to be on the slightly longer side of short stories between 8000-10,000 words however I think if I did approximately 5 stories per book I could do a nice collection. I just have to really take time even if I have to schedule it to write down time in my life i want to spend to writing whether that be when Vincent sleep’s one day, or one evening I end stream a touch early and write, Or I take a weekend my boyfriend is with the baby and take an hour or two then.
Next I would like to write a book that becomes so big movies are written based on them. Think Lord of the Rings, or Harry Potter big. I have some bits and pieces for these books. I feel like I really want to have a good base down as far as chapters, characters, scenes before tackling this type of book series. That would be so much for me to really put together and make it all connect correctly. I also feel like if I write the mini/short stories first then it will help me understand stories a bit better and what it takes. I have never really written something this big before in my life so I kind of want to work my way up to that as well too. All it really takes is an amazing book to make yourself known. Or even think Stephen King big!
I have also thought about doing a poetry content book. I say this and the term is probably wrong however I never really researched it. I just thought maybe a romance poetry book, or moving collection of poems could be a nice thing to do. When I was younger I always really enjoyed writing out my feelings. Types of things that were suicide related, I know topics we never talked about ever. And it was a great release. Now that I am older I don’t feel those feelings however I would like to revisit that side of my life in a different light. I loved poems that could rhyme and what not as well. I think it could be a great little side of writing that I could put out to the world. Even motivational or seasonal. I would however have to look a little bit though in terms of structure or patterns you can do since it has been so long. However I would love to explore that area again too!
As you can see there really is a lot that I would like to write about. And I am sure that any writer would also feel overwhelmed by this. The hardest part which I’m not even thinking about is the process of publishing it when it has been written. How much does it cost? Where to go? How to market the book? What about a proof reader? Or editor or whatever else. I have no idea where to begin with this. There is some help though. On my Facebook some of my mom’s friends have in fact published books. When the time comes Ill probably ask both of them and see where that can take me. Money may be a factor but if so I will just have to save save save! Like honestly, how much does it cost to have a whole book printed? I have no idea but some books are expensive to buy! Which type of book would be easier to print? Do I want a hard cover or soft cover or both? The more I sit here I find more and more questions to ask. Good thing Ill have this blog to refer back to for when I have to ask them I wont be forgetting anything.
I have yet to decide how I will be going about this. Do I want to set up goal of writing so many words withing a time frame? Do I just want to schedule time in and write for the period? Would it be better if I set a monthly word goal so I can kind of have a bit of a relaxed but still have a goal for the end of the month? And what would a reasonable amount be! I guess I really need to be sitting down and figuring out these before the end of the month and the beginning of 2021. That way I can know the expectations I set on myself before hand and hopefully wont be dreading them in the process either. But I know this is something that i really want to do for myself. If I wait I am afraid the longer I go without planning to write and be an author the less likely it will be to happen. This year I would like to be something at home. Hopefully make some what of a financial income even it it might take a bit to get there.
What is something you always wanted to do in your life? Did you end up doing it or holding off?
Let me know in the comments below!
-StaySeeJ08

January Update 2021
Naturally I’m slacking at anything and everything. But, don’t we all during the holidays? I feel like this year I completely was in a “screw it” mindset. From being on lock down and unable to go anywhere for Christmas, not even to my Uncle’s house to celebrate. I have felt like just kind of going into a minor sad sack party for one where I just don’t do anything at all. This has been basically all. Here is an update though however horrible it may turn out due to the fact that I am kind of hoping writing about it and prepping for this will help me get into a great mindset! As normal I am writing this a few days before it is released due to the fact that well, I have a 10 month old son and it is a lot easier to prep myself for blogs coming out then struggle to get it out on the exact day I release them to you all! So here we go into our update!
Weight Loss and Workouts have been non-existent. Going forward obviously I am going to be starting a new workout schedule. I am going to try doing the Elliptical 5 days a week, These will be on Saturday and Sunday, And then Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursdays. Monday and Friday will be off days for Elliptical. I also would like to introduce some workout DVD’s into the mix. My goal is to do those about 4 or 5 days a week as well maybe Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Friday’s. Those will be just to change things up a bit and I’m able to put my son in his play pen while I do them. Obviously I wont be doing them if my Boyfriend is home because I find it embarrassing to do something like that if he were to watch. They also are about 30 minutes and I am sure my son will find it funny to see Mommy jumping around and or dancing and things as well too. I think by changing it up I wont get so bored of working out. As far as calories goes, I am sticking to anywhere from 1250 to 1750 calories per day as well. I know it will be hard to do but I have faith I can do it though. I have only allowed myself about 7 days to smoke weed and if I count my birthday in the beginning of the month as well as every Saturday it really only leaves me with 1 flex smoking weed day. With this goal munching and sabotaging myself will probably be non-existent I hope.
Streaming is something I am really looking forward to this year. I am loving the Art streams on Sunday’s and hope to incorporate more into the schedule as well too. I am going to start with streaming 4 days a week again and have a bit more structure. I am confident I can make this work because I wont be smoking as much weed either. When I smoke too much before a stream I get lazy and end streams way too early, or I just am not in a good attitude. And even if I am I just want to munch and I’m not putting my all into content creation like I should be doing. i want to make the channel more of a brand and not just a person playing video games. I would like to convey to people that I am taking this content creation thing seriously and that I would like to make some sort of “Job” out of this as well too. In order to do that as “Easy” as it might be, I need to treat it like a job and I wouldn’t be getting high or leaving work early right!
Art is going to be a bigger focus in my life and streams. Everyone needs some sort of creative outlet. This is what I am going to be doing. Sometimes Ill be doing artwork for when (Hopefully this year) we move back to Nova Scotia. Sometimes Ill be doing art work to go up on my socials for sale and hopefully make a few dollars that way also. I will be using this as a creative outlet and hopefully become more zen with myself. I find I can let a lot of little things effect me and make me angry when they shouldn’t. I lash out at my loved ones of I bottle things up til I get really mad. I shouldn’t be doing this. Not to mention being stuck inside due to COVID certainly has not helped anyone either. This is a way for me to really start to be in touch with my creative self again. Whether it be beginning to write in my books or whether it be drawing or writing. This is something growing up my parents would always nurture. Whether they gave encouraging words, or they were buying me different and new art supplies they always wanted me to be doing something like this because they knew I was able to. Even crafting and things as well. I need to do more of this in my life and streaming and sharing it with others is exactly how I am going to do that!
Financial Independence is something that I would like to get back. Being a stay at home mom is great but I miss being able to have some type of an income coming in. Whether it be with streams or the blog or some premium content in the future I know that I would like to make a monthly income of 250-500$. I don’t think that is unreasonable with what I am doing now its tweaking and making things more accessible to what people may be wanting in their life. I will be giving myself til the end of the year to try to make a somewhat steady income.
This is a super rough over view of my update for January.
What are your goals you would like to achieve before the year is out, Are they different then last year.
Let me know what your helpful tips are when you are trying to keep on track of things.
I am always looking for different ways to adapt my own too!
-StaySeeJ
New Year’s Resolutions
If you are reading this you will probably notice this is released WAY before New Years Eve. Mostly because I would like to take 2 weeks off from blogging (Officially since I have been on mini hiatus through out the year) and spend some time with my little family since it will be the first one for my son!
New Years Resolutions are tricky. You have the typical I want to save money or I want to lose weight. Where everyone goes hard on making these goals happen while falling off the wagon so to speak at the end of January. Typically I do not really set goals or haven’t done really resolutions in a very very long time. Not that I can remember anyways. This year I want to do something different though. I want to try to set myself up for success BEFORE the new year begins and have a solid, sustainable plan. I would like to do some things so that if I slack I can make life a bit easier and not have to worry about slacking off.
First what I am doing is laying out a plan. Not in my planner per-say but in my content creation scribbler. This is where I go through with the help of a calender and write out all the dates for specific things ie: All the days in a month down the page for streaming so I can accurately keep track of my streams and how long I stream. I wrote out all of the dates blogs will release so every single Tuesday and Saturday so that I can just fill in the title and how many words are in each (With the goal being a 1000 minimum for each). I also will be writing every Monday and Friday for the different youtube videos that I would like to be putting out as well too. This way I can see dates that are upcoming and figure out if they are around a holiday, Do I want to do something before or use that subject for it, whatever the case might be. I have an agenda but I mostly us this for other goals and things. My scribbler is something that I carry over from year to year!
Blogs, I would like to pre-write 25 at least. I know this seems daunting however I would like to write a book (Another blog subject!) and if i can get a bunch of blogs written before hand I can just schedule them as the time comes. And if a subject is more relavant than another I can switch them around. Not to mention if we hopefully get pregnant with baby number 2 next year that is a whole new batch of blogs so if I am able to do something ahead of time on subjects that won’t be changing ie: Types of food I like, I want to write a book, What I keep track of when trying to lose weight etc, It can help me keep busy and not snack in the mean time! Though if I post a review or something that wont be schedule I will just post them as it happens. Reviews are a lot longer than these by about 500 words so for me to post them willy nilly it really wont be an issue! Just as long as I have seen the movie or show I want to review!
I want to write a book. I have a bit of a start by researching types of mythical creatures but overall I would like to start with a mini series of short stories. Where each book focuses on a types of mythical creatures, so an example would be perhaps like classics ie: vampires and werewolves and witches. And so on. These short stories will be anywhere from 7500-10,000 words each with approximately 5 stories in each book. My goal would be to start with writing one of these books. If I get more bonus. To achieve this I will be scheduling in some writing time each week so that I can just write. The key is being disciplined enough to actually write when I schedule it. I would ultimately like to write a series simular to Harry Potter but I feel like starting with these would be kind of neat and work on my creativity as well too.
And one of the last goals I have and certainly not least, Losing weight. I want to continue to lose weight. I feel like it is extremely harder for me to lose weight right now especially since giving birth to my son. But I would much rather be my current weight as the max weigth with baby number 2 than gain as much as I did with my son. That was a lot of weight and I know it will probably be much harder this time around while caring for him and pregnant. I feel like I am in a good place where I am not really smoking as much weed which is a huge success. Obviously I indulge a bit over the holidays but we will be right back at it though. If I want to lose weight I cannot smoke as much weed as I have been. I self sabotage myself so much that I need to learn to not do that anymore. Truth be told, I feel a lot better though since slowing down the smoking since I am not completely eating a weeks worth of calories by bingeing in an hour!
Overall time will tell if I stick to these resolutions, The major thing I think will be if and when we move back home. I am looking forward to having out own house again, our own space and privacy. I would like to be able to paint and decorate our house and have a bedroom where I don’t have to crawl out of bed but I can walk around the entire thing. I would like to be a drive away from my parents even If I don’t end up going there often because I am lay the possibility will still be there again and that is exciting!
Do you make resolutions for the new year?
Did you use to and don’t now?
Let me know in the commented below! I’m curious!
-StaySeeJ08
December Update
December is a month I am looking forward to the most this year. Why you may ask, Because it means that HOPEFULLY next year I will be on my way back to Nova Scotia and away from Quebec. This province is actually a different country INSIDE of Canada. A blog in the future will be coming out about that though. Not to mention my favorite holiday is also in December which after is my Birthday month! More blogs coming as well for the holidays I just have to really think about them and type them up this week! Now that my house is decorated and things as well too!
I’m quitting weed. Ok. Let’s not get too crazy here. I’m not really quitting but I am drastically cutting back. That is for sure. The reality of weed and me is that when I smoke I get lazy, as in I’ll stop the stream earlier than I would like, not helping me grow or be consistent. I already stream at a peek hour in the evening which is not ideal for someone who wants to grow or see any type of improvement since so many heavy hitters are also on as well. I am ending the stream after an hour which I am not happy about doing since it doesn’t really get people who know the stream to really get involved too! Not to mention I then beat myself up about it because I know ending a stream early is not helping any thing I am looking to achieve. I also have no self control high. I literally will eat and eat and eat til I feel like crap and do it all again the next time. From here on out no more high streams and only smoking on Friday and Saturday. However when I see results with pounds being gone I’m sure it may be even less. Though there will be a special time when I probably have a puff or so on stream it just wont be in the way of my goals for the channel too! Not to mention it doesn’t help my weight AT ALL either!
Stream schedule will be adding back Sundays as an art stream. I used to do those every Sunday morning last year as part of an emote re-creation wall. Then the year was over and I didn’t know what to do. I’m bringing this back in part for myself. I miss crafting and art. So by putting it in the stream I’m a little forced to do it. Mentally I think it will help me have a creative outlet while being cooped up inside due to Covid.
Blog direction will be steering away from streams or streaming subjects. The support I received from the weight loss struggles has been overwhelming, not to mention after nearly a year of blogging, it made me realize that obviously streaming topics were complete misses. I’ll be keeping it to a more personal and open subject, just life to parenting to my opinion too. Sure maybe streaming subjects will pop up from time to time but it won’t be anytime soon! I think we will also be trying to re-vamp the blog a bit and make it more personal. To really lean away from the whole streaming section. Make it more appealing and more interesting for people to want to read it. Not to mention I have to think of a catchy name for the blog as well too. Which can be challenging in itself since it can sometimes make or break a blog! I want it to be captivating and capture what the blog is really about! And obviously a touch of humor too!
YouTube will be changing in part with the weed thing. I can’t record baked beauty if I’m barely smoking weed maybe once I get a handle on my eating I will bring it back, but for now a mini break. I have 2 video ideas for uploads in January. it will be still Monday and Fridays. Mondays will be the crafting or creating section but sped up and put to music like a satisfying video. Friday’s will be a stream highlight video. Both should be fairly easy to edit. I need to really manage my time and think about how I can not spend a lot of time editing one video. I need to really think about ways to not spend a long time on a video, when I spend a long time on a video I find myself being extremely lazy and unmotivated to keep going.
Content Overall I think will be taking a major step forward with planning the next year to be successful. I really am trying to plan my blogs and videos so that I don’t miss anything and I can be consistent. I am my own biggest critique. When I plan big things and I dont do them right or I slack I then spiral and slack even more about it. I need to set myself up for success and I think with me planning and having a clearer mind it will really help in the long run for sure!
Crafting and Me time as much as I didn’t want to schedule this I think adding it back into the streams will be great. I really enjoyed when we did the emote artwork on my channel every Sunday morning. Mind you, with a baby they will be in the evenings but I think it will be a great way to have a little creative moments and self care for myself to start the week. Sometimes I find myself getting lazy when it comes to things that I enjoy. I don’t have to do a full stream of it but if we just hung around with members of my community and did artwork and what not I think that will be a great start to some good growth and pulling in viewers who just want to relax without game play.
The reality is I say all these things I just hope I can really stick to them! I have a good feeling that this could be a good month and here is hoping I keep the momentum going though! I need to remember that if I slip up though to not be so hard on myself and when or if it happens not to let the one day snow ball! That is a downfall I have where I let one slip up continue and I shouldn’t be like that!
See you at the end of the month for another update! And prep your belly’s for some sweet blogs this month!
-StaySeeJ08
I struggle with weight loss.
As you may or may not know based on the MANY blogs I have wrote about this, Weight loss for me is hard. For more reasons than I would like to admit. Before I start, This is not a way for me to make excuses and what not. This is me putting out my struggle with my weight in to the world to see if I can make changes, Be held accountable. And maybe if you decide to follow the journey that I am going to be doing you will be inspired to figure out your own healthy lifestyle in the process as well too!
I am a very picky eater. In fact, There is probably more that I don’t eat than things that I do. From meat, The only things I eat there are processed fish sticks, chicken nuggets, chicken breast and sometimes different parts of a chicken and hotdogs ( if you even call it meat) and bacon.. Which obviously I do not eat really that often. I do like some nuts and seeds though so that helps. As far as veggies go, I eat potatoes very rarely and sometimes sweet potato fries. Fruits I don’t eat anything. I will drink orange juice or apple juice and VERY rarely smoothies but it really depends on how I feel for that as well. I would say I love pastas and cheese and dairy but anything really different I just do not eat complicated “adult” meals. As a kid I did eat a lot more but as I got older my parents went with the “Don’t eat this no dessert” And I just never had dessert. No one was forcing me! It also is a texture thing for me as well. I don’t eat certain things because they are too “gooey”. This is probably why I don’t like pudding or jello as well. It boggles my boyfriends mind that I will drink a David’s Tea blend with dried fruits and things but I wont eat the fruit itself. It is a little weird right?
Also before you are all “BuT wHy DoNt YoU JuSt EaT tHiNgS” it really isn’t that simple at all. I have almost an anxiety over trying new food. If I want to try something I have to mentally prepare for it for at least a few days and how I will make it. I also have a thing with sizes. When I see a whole chicken breast I feel like it is just SOO much to eat at once. But if I was to chop that same chicken breast up into small pieces and say pan fry it with some honey garlic sauce that would be more appealing to me. As far as meat goes, I have no desire really to eat a burger or steak while pork just sounds gross to me. I wouldn’t ever be a vegetarian however I would be down for mostly being one I guess?
I am my own worst enemy. I eat when I am happy and I eat when I am sad. I eat when I am bored and I eat when I am busy. And Im not talking meals Im talking like I am just snacking on chips, chocolate, junk food, and all mindless. A big setback for me is I smoke weed. I can do extremely well all day counting calories and really hammering down on working out and as soon as I have a puff I ruin it in the span of an hour and a half. Which is not healthy on more levels than one. Going forward I will only be smoking on days that I record one of my baked beauty and the occasional weekends as well too. I need to stop munching so much if I am unable to control myself. Its not worth it. I need to have self control and really get back to basics. I also need to focus on doing things with my hands which I got some new plastic canvas and have been killing pinterest for patterns and things as well too.
As I sit here writing this I had previously wrote half of the blog and wrote the other half now, I am a bit buzzed and ruined my calories in the span of about 45 minutes. I really need to be strict with myself. I don’t even think I would say half the problem is smoking weed. I would say its that I love candy and chocolate and eating it is well, I’m sure you can understand. This weekend when this releases on November 14th, I will be for sure planning my recording days til the end of the year. That way I can have designated days where I have a puff. Soon enough as well my boyfriend will be going back to work and since I don’t smoke in the day or when I am alone with my son I won’t be smoking as much. We will both be taking a day on the weekend to sleep in but through the week we have to be up early and I don’t want to be super beat and tired for that! (I am tired writing this since I was up at 5am though! haha)
I can do this. I have high goals. Here they are. It wont be easy but it will be so rewarding when I get there. Currently I am approx 239.9 pounds. I know. It disgusts me as well.
By the end of November Id like to be under 230 pounds.
By the end of December I would like to be under 220 pounds.
By the end of January I would like to be under 210 pounds.
I am speaking this into existence and hopefully it will trigger something to really hammer down and help me be motivated in this. I need to get this done before we have another baby. When they talk about sugar and things being addictive they really are. And until you are addicted to it, you never really know!
Thanks for reading, I will try my best to do this! And document progress. Maybe what I learn and do will help others!
-StaySeeJ08
May Overview/June Goals
May was a decent month even if the ending was a bit slacked. My hours streamed are getting up there to my goal of 40 hours per month. This is even with slacking off at the end of the May. Some stats were slightly up also. However if I was a bit more consistent then it might have been different. Schedule change is also happening. We are dropping Friday’s and moving it to Wednesday’s. This way we have all 4 stream days together and all of our off days also together too. Obviously we may still do bonus streams on Friday or Saturdays for the spooky games I play or even the podcast/talk show that I will talk about later in the blog as well! Overall I have major improvements to make however I am happy with May stream wise!
I was stupid to think I could start YouTube by June. I think it was overly ambitious however the new goal for YouTube is to do a soft launch with the blog writing streams, and in the Fall. Go full editing with montages, memories, funny clips, blog reading, podcast/talk show etc. Also, looking at commissioning an intro and outro for YouTube. I was going to wait for the fall as well, when I have a full revamp done. However why wait for the YouTube so I can fine tune it over the summer for videos to come out! These blog videos and writing should be easier to edit however clips and things I want to learn all the bells and whistles. I’m excited to hopefully be able to bring in new viewers to the channel both on YouTube as well as twitch!
A few weeks ago I had won over twitter a mindset coaching sessions with a woman named Victoria Waye. She is a Mindset Coach and has really helped with thinking outside of the box for myself and what I should be doing and directions to be taking. It’s hard to brand yourself when you aren’t sure the direction you want to take. For me I was full of ideas but there are some things that I never even thought about! We have had 2 sessions so far and I look forward to the other 2 in the coming weeks. From thinking about pushing the blogs as being a front runner to the content that I produce! It’s something that I never put much value in when I probably should have. It is something that makes me unique which is hard to see about yourself. If you want to contact her and discuss these things here is her twitter which she is super active on also: https://twitter.com/TheVictoriaWaye
An idea that I was suggested which never crossed my radar is recording the blogs being read and uploading them so say Spotify or a website called anchor for podcast. That way I can deliver the same content however just the audio so folks could listen perhaps on their drive to work, at the gym, or cleaning or whatever they feel like doing with a bit of background noise too! Something as simple as this I had no idea I could do. However I don’t personally listen to audio books, or podcasts so for me it’s just something that isn’t exactly on my mind. However I need to look a bit more into where to put these and where the most value may be. Which is nothing really but a bit of research!
More on this space, I’m thinking in July on Saturdays we start a podcast/talk show on my channel. I’m feeling Saturdays since people may work or if there is any EU people/UK people then everyone can make it as a viewer or guest since Saturday’s can be flexible time wise. Something light, funny, maybe a few drinks and just kicking it. Nothing serious (There is enough of that in the world!) I would have myself as the host (Obviously) and I would also have 5 guests, I’m thinking we use discord since that seems to be easiest. Guests would rotate each week however if some wanted to be regular that would also work! It would be Bi-Weekly since we all have lives and it might be tricky to get a lot of people together. My goal is to start this July 11th/2020.
Weight loss is something that I have struggled with doing my whole life. Sometimes I can be bang on with exercise and controlling what I eat. I am a very big emotional eater whether its happy or sad. I also am lazy obviously however I know what I need to do. Overall I would say May is Okay for this goal. I am not down any pounds. June goal is to be down 10lbs by the end. I also have set myself up with an elliptical schedule with Thursdays being a rest day, And workouts anywhere from 40-80 minutes. Neighborhood walks are kind of non existent right now because it is way to hot sometimes for the dog and baby to be just walking around. Maybe a bit at night if there is a chill day but other then that they are kind of on hold til the fall. I also have done my Calorie Counting book til the end of the month with some rewards when I hit a 10lbs weight loss goal. These are more or less just buy a new outfit, splurge on Davids Tea or things like that. No real food rewards since that would be silly. I also have to stop munching out from smoking weed. That is my biggest problem, I can do well all day and fail when I think food is greater than it is. Also changed my workouts to the evening instead of morning. Just to make it easier on my Boyfriend. He normally watches my son in the afternoon while I stream and feeds him in the mid-late afternoon and supper while I do his bottles. So this is great for me to change instead of the mornings so he was essentially watching him steady with me mixed in as well so he can have time to game or hang out instead of little pieces throughout the day. Now its more of a schedule!
Overall I am happy with how May went and I have a lot to look forward to! I want to really focus on content as well as my weight loss goals too. I know what I need to do but doing it can be super challenging. And honestly I need to stop treating/rewarding myself with junk food. I’m able to resist! I know I can!
-StaySeeJ
My Personal Stream/Life Goals For 2020
Whoa! Whose this writing a blog, being informative and putting more time in to something that I don’t have time to do. If you are already here you basically know who I am. If not I would suggest clicking the “Who Am I” tab near the top for the quick facts! For the record, We will do our best to keep things PG13 in the sense that there will not be any swear words to discover in these writings, However there will be strong opinions and stances on topics mostly related to gaming however with life ever impacting things there will also be topics slide in there too!
Setting goals on whatever subject can legit be a tough thing to do. Whether they are about streaming, gaming, life, weight loss or any other type of goals. Firstly, a person has to think about which type of goals do they want, You have 2 choices (At least I’m my opinion, Keep it simple!) Short term and long term goals. There are also medium term goals but I normally focus on short and long for myself. Medium can be harder to really establish since they still have to be achievable while still being motivating as well too.
For myself, I will be setting short term goals and long term ones for the year 2020. My short term ones will be changing and evaluated every month. I keep track of stats for streaming and see how I am doing. Example: How is my viewers, Do I have growth? How is my social presence? After the month I check where I am at and see what I need to do. Ask myself questions like, If I didn’t reach a goal why didn’t I reach it? Was I slacking on twitter? Did I slack on hours for streaming so I wasn’t available for people to watch the stream? Those are how I set short term goals. I make sure that they are attainable. I also make sure that at the end of the month I’m not going to be let down. Say you are at 500 followers on twitch or twitter, Setting a goal short term of wanting to hit 1000 or 1500 in a month is SUPER unrealistic. And normally not attainable. That would be more like a 6 month goal (Medium term) or even better a 12 month goal (Long term). When these types of unreachable goals are unmet at the end of the month it makes it harder to continue and is a good reason to give up. Especially if you sometimes find it easy to be hard on yourself and can lose motivation really easily (Like myself!).
Long term ones are a bit harder. You have to almost predict your future and see how you do in a sense. Ask yourself, Where do I see myself at this very moment a year from now? For me, It is a bit tricky for sure considering in March we will be having our first baby. Long term is more like a feeling for me. Which contradicts my whole previous written stance on goals. My goal long terms it so continue to retain social media presence and a “Semi” Regular stream schedule. Which we all know will be impossible or at least next to that, BUT for me it will be more like, Stream 50 hours a month. Whenever and whatever. I will probably be doing more laid back things, Like a simulator game or even reacting to videos in “Just Chatting”. It will be more laid back and probably times when a webcam will not be used due to the fact that breast feeding (However long I decide to do it) while on cam is just not for me. (And if people do it then so be it! I just am not going to be that person!).
Here is the point form of goals I will be setting for myself on all platforms I wish to focus on:
Short term goals, To be checked at the end of every month.
Twitter:
1 post of discord link a day
1 Question/Poll a day
1 Photo a day of anything
1 Going live tweet (If going live on that day)
25+ Followers per month
Instagram:
2 Clips a week (Mon/Fri)
3 Going live posts (Sun/Tue/Wed)
1 Blog Screen shot (Thurs)
1 Random video post (Sat)
Twitch:
25+ Followers per month
50-80 hours streamed per month (Closer to 50 hours after baby is born)
1 giveaway of a steam key per month (Minimum)
Long term goals:
Twitter:
4750 followers by December 31st 2020
35k tweets by December 31st 2020
Instagram:
25k Followers by December 31st 2020
1200 Posts/Clips etc by December 31st 2020
Twitch:
3500 Followers by December 31st 2020
10-20 Average viewers by December 31st 2020 (As baby grows)
With that being said, These are my goals. I will be trying to re-check as it goes since obviously having a baby is a HUGE change in anyone’s life. Long term goals may change slightly just depends on how they go and what not.
Another change that will be happening is a minor schedule change, From Sunday-Wednesday. And one stream of 10am-4pm as well too. 6 hours a day and 4 days a week. I think the transition will be great in terms of trying to take more of a backseat/support role as well for when the baby is born.
Whether you want to to make short term, long term, random goals. Goals are great in helping a person stay on track. I cant wait to hear what YOUR goals are and what they are about and how you are going to reach them too! Remember it is also important to note that there will be months that aren’t as productive as other months, and some months your stats may soar where others months they may flop. THAT IS OKAY! Don’t panic and keep on track! May 2020 be a year to accomplish different things and reach new heights!
-StaySeeJ08