Tag Archives: things i wish I knew when pregnant

What People Wish They Knew About Pregnancy – Part 3

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Before I begin, I want to say this is something that I had asked the people on the app “Peanut”. This is an app where mothers sign up and can meet other moms around their towns and essentially become friends and hang out (Not a sponsor). However for me I felt it was far too overwhelming and in typical fashion I stopped using the app. I did however ask a question to the community, that question was “What is something you wish people told you about pregnancy or birth”. These are some responses and once the other parts become active I will be posting them below with links. And you are more than welcome to check them out yourself too!

What do you wish people told you about pregnancy and birth Part 1
What do you wish people told you about pregnancy and birth Part 2

Photo by Burst on Pexels.com

Fundal Massage for uterus was something that I had NO IDEA about when I had given birth the first time. I will say having a c-section for my second I did not notice if there was any massage which I assume there was not due to the fact I had just been cut open there. However with my first vaginal birth HOLY MOLY it was tough. The nurses literally will put their palm or even their fingers and wiggle it around your abdomen to see if your uterus is shrinking back and it does not tickle. They check this periodically and it is absolutely not comfortable at all. Yes it is important and needs to be done but just know that it does not feel great though at all. I know when it comes to having our third and final child, as much as I am hoping to have a vaginal birth similar to our second I am HOPING that this massage happens quickly and it becomes short lived!

*** If you would like to support this blog financially you are more than welcome to do so by clicking this link here to bring you to my Ko-Fi website. Supporting the blog via tips is NEVER pressured however if you feel so inclined to help out in another way this is a perfect way to do so! You can see some behind the scenes items as well as insider info on the store updates and uncensored blogs also coming soon!


Forceps or vacuum was something I knew very little about and thankfully with the 2 children I have (And hopefully the 3rd when the time comes) we dont need to know anything about these! This is where you have to have these tongs to help pull your baby out. And the vacuum is just that, it will suction to the top of your babies head to help them come out of you. I was only told about these in my 1st pregnancy when the doctor was half threatening me with gaining too much weight and how this may be something that is needed if I kept gaining. Luckily I never needed them as my son came so fast however I have heard of these being essential in giving birth for whatever reason. In the moment I can imagine they are horrifying and worrisome.

Lack of sleep from labor to months later is something that you may think is assumed however it isn’t. I will say that with my first two son’s they have been nearly incredible sleepers compared to stories I have heard from friends. As obvious as it may be no one really talks about the lack of sleep you get after a baby is born. For my second pregnancy I found it was a lot harder to sleep the bigger I had gotten however I don’t remember that with my first. Afterwards you are also looking at about 2 months of lack of sleep where the first month you are basically a zombie in the process. I know it sounds crazy but it is true. Babies do drink every 3 hours so they need to really be up that much. After about 2 months both of my son’s slept alright averaging maybe 6-9 hours a night. What makes this challenging is that when you have multiple children. With my first I was able to sleep when he slept and catch up on sleep. However with my second that was not entirely possible due to the fact that he was on one nap per day and the newborn didn’t exactly sleep when you wanted them to!



Mom Guilt is something that I dont think anyone ever can prepare you for. This also can be parenting guilt too. One of the first things I know I felt guilty about with mom guilt was not wanting to breast feed. It is hammered down our throats as a mom that if you don’t you are depriving your child of certain things that they never talk about all the reasons why breast feeding may not be right for your family. For me, mentally I just was unable to breastfeed. I did not enjoy it, I felt wrong doing it, and when my son had jaundice and feeding was super important to make it go away it scared me and made me paranoid that he was not drinking enough. That is not to say that it doesn’t work for other people but for me I loved the fact that my spouse was able to feed our children and I was able to sleep a bit, or that I wasn’t hooked up to some sort of pump the entire time or waking every 2 hours trying to make things happen. The guilt I felt this for my first child was tough. It was extremely hard to even get past. I have a friend who breastfeeds her kids and she said flat out fed is best. There is such a stigma about parents who choose to formula feed that it needs to be stopped. It would probably help with things like postpartum depression as well if we never had so many pressures on us parents before the baby has even been born!

As you can see there is multiple things that may seem pretty obvious to others however this is not the case. This is something that maybe by writing these out a new parent may know before the situation arises! And if you are pumped to read this I can’t wait for you to read the other ones when they come out too!

If you would like to purchase the book you are more than welcome to do so here, though the link is for the Canadian site you may need to be redirected to the Amazon sited for your Country to be able to purchase a copy for yourself!

What People Wish They Knew About Pregnancy – Part 2

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Before I begin, I want to say this is something that I had asked the people on the app “Peanut”. This is an app where mothers sign up and can meet other moms around their towns and essentially become friends and hang out (Not a sponsor). However for me I felt it was far too overwhelming and in typical fashion I stopped using the app. I did however ask a question to the community, that question was “What is something you wish people told you about pregnancy or birth”. These are some responses and once the other parts become active I will be posting them below with links. And you are more than welcome to check them out yourself too!

What do you wish people told you about pregnancy and birth Part 1
What do you wish people told you about pregnancy and birth Part 3

Photo by Daniel Reche on Pexels.com

One subject someone said was the decreased sex drive while breast feeding. This could be strongly because while in the first few weeks and months after the birth of your child, if you choose to breastfeed, you will spend a lot of your time with them attached to your chest. Maybe you are pumping for relief though so others can also feed your little one however if you are exclusively breastfeeding you will be spending a lot of your energy with them attached to your breast. Which obviously to some extent will make you maybe not have the sex drive you once had before giving birth.

*** If you would like to support this blog financially you are more than welcome to do so by clicking this link here to bring you to my Ko-Fi website. Supporting the blog via tips is NEVER pressured however if you feel so inclined to help out in another way this is a perfect way to do so! You can see some behind the scenes items as well as insider info on the store updates and uncensored blogs also coming soon!

How long to feel normal varies from person to person however it does not happen over night. If I remember correctly I feel like giving birth vaginally made it so that I was able to feel normal a whole lot sooner than it did when I had a c-section birth. I even went as far as talk about the two difference between them in a blog here and I also talk about how there were challenges that I had to overcome with having a c-section in this blog post here. The fact is giving birth to another human has a lot of challenges. However no one prepares you to ever have to wait a long time to feel normal and healed or even yourself again. When will it stop hurting when you walk up the stairs? Who knows but that is something to think about as well. And if you take longer to feel normal compared to your friends who have had kids there is absolutely nothing wrong with it taking longer or maybe quicker. Times vary from person to person.


What to buy what not to can be a bit subjective. In the fact that what someone might recommend might not be needed for other families and whatever. That being said, I know someone out there needs to hear that, there is NO NEED to over buy every single toy you see on the shelf or every single type of shirt, pants or outfit on the rack. If you have enough clothes to go through a week without doing laundry or even a few spare clothes because accidents do happen, you do not need everything under the sun. You will find that as your child ages there is also people who will be buying different things that will continue to fill up your home. I’m not saying don’t buy anything just ask yourself if you need it. For the most part my children have so many toys from friends and family and holidays that I even hide half of them in the other room and swap them out every few months so that they have new things to play with and it is a surprise too.

Second hand shops save money as well as Facebook market place. There are some specific things I wouldn’t buy from those places like maybe stuffed animals because at the time some things may be hard for cleaning purposes however if it is a plastic toy or something that you can clean regularly there is so many things that people can re-use instead of buying new. And if you want to get some sort of savings or even be a family with toys every where (guilty) then this is a great way to save money.

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How lonely it gets is something that I dont personally thing that I feel a lot however I do understand it. Especially with Covid and people with babies are trying to limit contact with people outside of their immediate family however it is lonely. When you have multiple kids you might even be finding yourself isolated, and not on purpose, from people who are like minded. Sure it is great to hang with your children all day but it is also important to get out and have adult interactions. I have a spouse who is home nightly who I talk to and I do regularly talk to friends on messenger and things. That being said I am also looking forward to doing things like walking and little play dates in the summer with friends too. It is import to also have your own time whenever possible away from your children even just for some self care.

Drastic hair loss is something I have been fortunate to not have with either of my pregnancy however I have seen the mental damage it has done to people and friends who have encountered this not talked about enough issue. It is something that may happen every pregnancy, maybe one or two of your ones, or maybe it has different varying degrees too. It also has no timeline on how long it will last. I know for myself, as a woman, even though I have thick hair I can empathize with how it would make a woman feel when they have clumps of hair that have fallen out.

As you can see there is multiple things that may seem pretty obvious to others however this is not the case. This is something that maybe by writing these out a new parent may know before the situation arises! And if you are pumped to read this I can’t wait for you to read the other ones when they come out too!

Wish People Said About Birth/Pregnancy – Part 1

Parenting, , , , , , , , , , , ,

Before I begin, I want to say this is something that I had asked the people on the app “Peanut”. This is an app where mothers sign up and can meet other moms around their towns and essentially become friends and hang out (Not a sponsor). However for me I felt it was far too overwhelming and in typical fashion I stopped using the app. I did however ask a question to the community, that question was “What is something you wish people told you about pregnancy or birth”. These are some responses and once the other parts become active I will be posting them below with links. And you are more than welcome to check them out yourself too!

Photo by Nataliya Vaitkevich on Pexels.com



What do you wish people told you about pregnancy and birth Part 2
What do you wish people told you about pregnancy and birth Part 3

Breast feeding hurts is something that popped up a few times. You guys may know my stance on breast feeding in terms that I formula feed my son and did the same for my first. I breastfed for 3 days with my first child and it was not for me. When you look at movies and things you always assumed that breastfeeding was this easy thing and any parent loves to do it. This couldn’t be further from the truth. It is something that you have to literally teach yourself. And before anyone says, “maybe it hurts because of latch problems blah blah blah” it does not have to be physical hurt. I wrote a blog about normalizing formula feeding that you can read here before we often forget the mental strain of stopping the breastfeeding journey due to guilt society and other mom’s put on others.

*** If you would like to support this blog financially you are more than welcome to do so by clicking this link here to bring you to my Ko-Fi website. Supporting the blog via tips is NEVER pressured however if you feel so inclined to help out in another way this is a perfect way to do so! You can see some behind the scenes items as well as insider info on the store updates and uncensored blogs also coming soon!


Another mention someone had said was postpartum anxiety. Anyone hear the phantom crying? I know for us, my spouse and myself felt this with our first. I will also mention that the second child we had these anxieties seems to feel a bit more relaxed, maybe because we know that we have the skills needed to raise human however it doesn’t change how it felt for our first. These would be the anxiety’s that you have with your children, often times they are irrational and don’t even really make sense however they are important to note that there is a lot of anxiety after the birth of your baby. Feeling these are completely normal and if you feel like it may be something that is excessive you should reach out to a health care provider to validate those feelings and work through them as they can be hard to work through.



The physical recovery, not during child birth. I know for me I am completely guilty of this. I totally slipped my mind the use of pads and things after giving birth and only did it click when I was having my first son and a friend had given birth a few months prior had given me their heavy duty pads they used and no longer needed. I know sounds completely dumb to forget that but I never even thought about bleeding even though it made sense. That being said there is multiple types of recover. I have had the no medication birth with my first and a vaginal delivery which you can read about here. I also have had a c-section birth that I talk about here with my second child too that you can read about here. But no one prepares you for how challenging it can be to have either birth. If I had to pick I would say the c-section was the harder birth due to the fact you legit had a major surgery. I am really hoping that our last and third child when the time comes is a vaginal birth and NOT a c-section however it it happens the only thing saving me mentally is that it will be the last c-section that I ever have. The physical pain you go through, even a vaginal birth with no tearing having to walk up stairs after arriving home was so challenging holy smokes. I never even thought of that either!

Breastfeeding is not birth control. I know a few people who learned this the hard way. And based on the people commenting on this answer there was a lot of others who found that out also. Though breast feeding may delay your period and what not, it still can not be used as a contraceptive. Unless you are on birth control or using controls, if a man ejaculates inside of you there is a strong change that you could be pregnant from this. This also goes for the “having sex before 6 weeks” and you may not get pregnant. False. There is a reason why you are told to wait 6 weeks and that is due to your body healing. Saying breastfeeding is a way to prevent pregnancy is not a solid one and you may find yourself playing with fire and having a little surprise bundle in 9 months time too.

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Milestone obsessions is something that is very real and I again feel like having multiple kids does ease this up. When you have one child you become obsessed with milestones. Are they crawling on time? Rolling? Walking or standing? The fact is the spectrum is so broad that your child may be doing one or all things at once and there is no really right or wrong way. Use the milestones as a guideline but there is no need to panic if they aren’t hitting everything that they need to be at the time. It is also important to note that if a few milestones are missing at one age they may catch up and have multiple milestones happening at other ages though. Sometimes milestones are grouped up and they aren’t as spread out for people.

As you can see there is multiple things that may seem pretty obvious to others however this is not the case. This is something that maybe by writing these out a new parent may know before the situation arises! And if you are pumped to read this I can’t wait for you to read the other ones when they come out too!