Monthly Archives: August 2021

3 TV Shows That We Let My Toddler Watch

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Letting your baby or toddler have any screen time can be controversial for a topic by itself. Apparently it has been said children under 2 should not be watching anything on TV. I am in the mind set that as I was the oldest of 3 children, and if I watched TV my younger siblings may have also watched and they turned out just fine. That being said, there are only a few shows we allow my son to watch right now. Let’s chat about which ones they are and why. Before I begin though, remember there is no “right or wrong” way to divide up or limit your child from watching TV. This is a personal parenting choice. However I think it may be debatable if you choose to be a parent to put the TV on with their favorite shows from dawn til dusk to essentially be a babysitter for you.

Number one, and current favorite show for my son is Blue’s Clues as well as Blue’s Clues and You. We put this show on when he was having trouble drinking his bottle at night because he wanted to look or focus on something. I actually used to watch the original series when I was a child. For it to come out and be remade is great. I think my son personally enjoys watching this television show due to the colors that are in the show, the songs and the fact that the host essentially talks to the audience. As he grows he will learn to pick up more and more from it too. Currently he has a peek-a-boo blue which he loves and knew who she was when he was just 10 months old and got her for Christmas. He also is beginning to clap, and laugh at particular parts of the show also. And if they show a part with dancing he will start to dance along too. As annoying as it is for parents to watch the same handful of shows for long periods of times, I would gladly watch Blue’s Clues as apposed to other shows out there.

Next we started to watch the show Bubble Guppies with my son. I remember my sister putting this show on for my niece and nephew. It teaches things and again every episode has some sort of songs. It is repetitive but there is so many episodes that repeating them often would be a challenge. My son again is getting to the age where he starts to dance at songs sometimes also. He is not as interested in this show as he has been on Blue’s Clues but it is probably his second favorite though. Easily. We also put it on simply to change it up when we are all Blue’s Clues out. Since the songs are different and the whole theme is not the same it really helps to break up the repetition especially since each show tends to focus on different things. Though, if it is the same subject matters they always have a different take on approaching it for many ways to learn. The fact that songs mostly change each episode also helps in a big way since we all know as parents how repeating songs can have on us! Sometimes if our son is not enjoying Blue’s Clues we put this on and he tends to enjoy it!

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And lastly, this more so I put on for him which is Octonauts. This is a show similar to Bubble Guppies with different animals rescuing others. It teaches about different sea animals and creatures that need helping from various reasons. Again as many kids shows it has special songs for different events that happen in the show. This show only ever gets put on occasionally because the 1st two mentioned are the major favorites but if this one does end up on he does enjoy it also too.

Then you have little shows we put on from Netflix like Pocoyo, or Masha and the Bear. This is quick shows that we start the day with only when I have to get his bottle ready, use the washroom myself, and take the dog out to do his business too! It is not full episodes by any means and just enough for him to be in his play pen while I run outside with the dog and know that the dog will be safe in the process too. They also can help keep him busy if I have to do some house work, quick cooking, or flip laundry since it is on a different level than the one we play on.

Preventing your child may seem easy but it really isn’t. Not to mention when you decide to have more children if the older ones are watching TV are you going to prevent them from doing so? Or are you going to just limit technology and not let it become an obsession. The total time daily my son in particular watches TV or some type of show would be a maximum of an hour and 15 minutes per day. Sometimes the max would be two hours but only due to the fact that I may have a few extra things to do around the house that this keeps him busy. Mind you, out TV is on all the time but as long as it does not have a cartoon type show on the TV it really is not a big deal as my son has no interest in those right now. When it is on he will typically play with his toys on the floor independently.

What do you think about letting your toddler watch some TV during the day.

Is there any shows that you dont allow your little one to watch? (Read the shows that I dont put on here)

Let me know your thoughts on this controversial subject below! I love to hear different parenting styles!

Overcoming a Crummy Relationship

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Overcoming a crummy relationship can really be subjective in the sense what one person may find what someone else does may be something totally different. As usual, these are things that I have found to help or even friends have found to have helped them when they are finding themselves in the middle of a break up.

To be fair, I have only ever had one break up in the romantic sense. For me, I was ready for it to be over so that made things easier. However this was when I was 18 til just turning 20 years old. He was abusive and we had broke up once before. However I was blind and thought I would go back for a second year like that was a good idea. These are some things that I did to help time pass and move on with the fact I was again single!

I focused a lot on friendships. In my situation I was almost isolated from my friends. When we had broken up I found support in friends whom I had disconnected with before. We did a bunch of things like going for drives, or even partying downtown. For the first few years I was legal to drink in Nova Scotia I never did. As I said I was isolated from things. I felt the need to just let things happen and experience the night life that everyone my age was wanting to experience. I feel like I really caught up to a bunch of friends who had been veterans to the bar scene. Getting to spend time and catch up with them was great for me. Some people I had seen across social medias but never had the time or opportunity to really catch up and see what was happening. Focusing on this also helped me to see what healthy relationships they were in, if they were, and kind of remind myself that the relationship I was in was toxic and not healthy.

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Another thing is time. There is no amount of time that you can take to get over a relationship, whether it ended mutually, whether it ended on good or bad terms. You have to be the one to decide whether or not it is time to move on. Sometimes people can move on from a relationship super quickly, other times they can take a long time to move on from a relationship. It really just depends on each individual person. And each relationship can also be different too. Maybe your first one you got over it super easy and the second one took a long longer. There is no right or wrong way to deal with a relationship and how much you need or how little you need to move on.

Another thing I did to try and get over the one relationship that I had that really impacted me was going back to things that I loved. Not just spending time with friends but I mean activities that I also loved. I liked to play games, and I liked to do art. I tried to do these things more often because I never had the chance to before. I put myself into working a bit more due to the fact I was spending most of my money on my ex, I was working a bit more to spend it on myself, finally. Even just chatting on the phone or updating socials and spending time outside can be huge. Sometimes in relationships that might not be great we end up losing a bit of ourselves and pushing aside things that you might regularly love, only to find yourself revisiting that when you are in a healthy and happy mindset.

One thing that I really wanted to do when I felt like looking up towards a relationship again was take my time. My current boyfriend of nearly 11 years understood that when I explained it to him. I wanted to really get to know him before we started to get serious. Just spend a lot of time together before hand and understand what we both wanted in life and with each other. My previous relationship I barely knew the guy and felt like I became trapped. This time it was super weird and I was happy that my current partner and I were able to build that strong foundation to be where we are today. It honestly still feels like a dream and I feel very fortunate to be able to call him my life mate.

Regardless of how long you have been with someone, or how it ended, remember, no one can dictate how you feel or how you are supposed to overcome any relationship, especially crummy ones. Sometimes being along and binge watching a comfort show on Netflix is the way to go. For me, I wanted to reconnect with people and just enjoy all of the things that I was held back from for so long. Including the bar scene, and other things like hanging with friends, going for drives for junk food and listening to old school music. I also wanted to just enjoy the freedom of being able to do whatever I wanted without restrictions and someone telling me what I could or couldnt do. That was huge for me especially with being stuck with the dumb ex for the previous 2 years. I am glad when I was transitioning to this relationship that I am currently in that I was able to really find who I was again, and not rush into another one. I feel like the break for me was completely necessary! And for some, maybe the break is not necessary at all either! Every person is different.

Have you ever had to overcome a crummy relationship in the past?
If so, Was there anything that you remember doing, that you are glad you did to help you move past this difficult time?

Let me know in the comments below! Some other readers might also be looking for some new tips and tricks too!

Getting Through The 1st Trimester

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Finding out that you are pregnant can be a very exciting time in anyone’s life! I know when we first found out we were pregnant with my first child, and now our second one we were excited! However I feel like my first pregnancy I was a bit lucky because I barely had any symptoms except for being tried. When I was tired I would just sleep But now having a toddler and being pregnant for the second time things are way more challenging. Here are my tips to help me get through the first trimester (With or without a toddler!).

SLEEP! In the first trimester you are probably losing a lot of sleep. Not only that but suddenly your bladder seems to be super small and you are running to the bathroom nearly every 3 hours especially in the middle of the night even if you did not do that to begin with before. Thought I was really lucky that my partner was home often I was able to sleep when I felt like it because he would watch our son. However, if he was working late I would still try to nap when my toddler did. It can be hard though because some days I would be super tired and go to sleep and would have one of those days where my son nearly never slept his nap time. However a lot of times it works really well to be able to nap when he does. It may not seem like a lot but it really is a decent amount of time to be able to sleep and not over sleep. Though be warned that sometimes I tend to find myself more tired after this. But catching up on sleep is really important if you are able to sleep during the day. I will say, going into the second trimester there is some relief in terms of when you need to run to the bathroom from your sleepy slumber but in terms of the increased bathroom visits. They will still be a lot due to the fact your body is housing a baby! Try to also drink water early in the day (Something that I do not do) And limit it late at night so that you find yourself hopefully nearly empty when it comes to having to get up to relieve yourself!

Prepping for morning sickness or food aversions was something I did with my first pregnancy and now this one even though I did not think I needed it much. I had certain staples in my kitchen such as ginger ale, little sour candies that would help with morning sickness. I also had carnation instant breakfast’s as well. They really helped in the morning when I was not interested in eating breakfast a lot and still filled me up though to be able to function at some point. I still have been pretty lucky even with this pregnancy in terms of morning sickness. Even when I did have it it was mainly after supper and by that point my boyfriend was already home and was able to take the the lead when it came to putting my son to bed and getting him ready for his sleep. Having things like this was a huge help especially the ginger cookies which I would have a few snacks on in the mornings when my stomach was just a bit more upset though.

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Make it fun and have an app or two! When I was pregnant with my son I used two in particular, they were Ovia Pregnancy and then What to Expect. These are super fun to use because you are able to pick a subject to compare the size of your baby! When I was pregnant with my son I used the “fruits and Veggies” theme for both. Every week was a milestone and it would compare the growing baby inside to whatever fruit it was comparable to! This time around I have chosen to do one for 80’s and 90s nostalgic items, and then another one in the “Fun and Games” category. This is a great way to compare the size of your baby to things you know the size of already. With baby number three I assume knowing myself I would be picking a different category to compare the size of the baby to! Another thing that is huge when it comes to these apps is every day or so it will post little tips and tricks about what is happening with the growth of your baby. From things developing and changing. Sure you may have multiple children but still is exciting to see how things develop since you may not remember when things happen as they happen.

Regardless about what you try to do when it comes to surviving the first trimester, there is really multiple things you can do to make it through. Another positive thing to remember is that even if the first trimester is rough, chances are things will slowly level out towards the 2nd trimester. I have been lucky and have found that whatever symptoms I have been feeling does normally seem to disappear a bit. However on rare occasions there are people out there who have to deal with major symptoms in the second trimester also. However, there are also medical interventions that you are perhaps able to take for things such as morning sickness if you talk to your doctor about how you are feeling.

Lastly, remember that there is also so many reasons to sick it out because at the end of everything no matter how sick you get you will have your little bundle of joy to be thankful for! When you see your child you suddenly forget all of the heartaches and sickness you may have felt as it just melts away!

Is there anything that you did when you were feeling a bit wonky in the first trimester?
Do you follow any of the tips and tricks that were mentioned above too?

Let me know as I am sure a lot of other readers would love to read about it also!

What is the “Nesting” Phase Really Like in Pregnancy

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You might be new to pregnancy, or you might be someone who knows all about it. For me, I have only ever experiences “Nesting” once. while I am currently waiting to find out if I do the same things for the second time also. Since every pregnancy is different I will be curious to see if there is anything majorly different between the two of them!

What people think nesting is, is a period of time before a baby is born where you are doing the weirdest, and over the top things. Typically people claim this is the time you scrub everything so that it is in tip top shape for when the baby arrives. This includes when you are prepping the room, hospital bag, cleaning and washing cupboards and dishes and walls. You are making sure that everything that can be is ready for when the baby is born. You are probably making sure you have more than enough clothes and then you are washing them also so they are nice and fresh for the new baby too. A lot of people would consider nesting the period in which you get that little boost of energy for a small period of time before you give birth to your child. I would say I agree with this however I dont know if at the time I knew what I was doing was nesting or if I just took advantage of the new found energy!

What I thought about for nesting and what actually happened I think are two different things. I did not think I would really have a big nesting period when it came to having a baby. Looking back now I would say that my nesting period was about the last few weeks of my pregnancy. I started with trying to get everything in place for the baby’s room. Washing clothes, decorating everything also. We did the Harry Potter theme for my son and that was something I worked on a bit as things went but I really tied it all together when the time came. We also did really good on trying to get everything prepped and ordered in terms of tools and trinkets we needed too. Lotions, body washes, socks, diapers, wipes everything in between we would try to get ready. After that I wanted to focus on our basement. Since moving it the place was a mes and since my Uncle was off work we really tried to get it some what organized before Vincent was born. We went through boxes and labeled things and got things ready to be thrown away. Everyone knows when you have a child you have a lot of things that you acquire as the time passes and it is important to really make space for that or you can be overwhelmed.

Aside from these two major things I cant really think of a whole lot that we really did before the baby came in terms of nesting. I think I did this stuff also around 35 weeks so that I was ready and able to spring into action if something happened. I wouldn’t say I really did anything outside of the box in terms of cleaning. Our home was not really bad in terms of clean. However maybe if we were stuck waiting and were over due with the pregnancy I would have done a lot more in terms of trying to get the action moving!

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Now, I am pregnant for a second time! Currently at the time of writing this I am about 18 weeks, still a long way to go! And by the time this is released and you are able to read it I will be in the middle of a move across provinces in Canada! I think if I was to predict the future I will be doing things to be able to prep for the baby by getting their room ready, we are not trying to do anything too serious or big until we know the gender. I have a few ideas on how to do the room however other than that we are just waiting to see. Another thing would be if we are having another boy I will have to re-wash some of the things that we used for my son and prepping those to get ready for the newest addition! I would like to think at the time we will be doing things to get the house up to our standards by painting, organizing and things like that. Nesting for this pregnancy also might be a lot of prepping my son for the arrival for his new sibling! Being an only child and suddenly having to share his parents might be an adjustment for him. Especially with Covid and not really socializing with people much either. Another reason why it might be a bit different is that we will be close to my family and the opportunity for them to help us might also make nesting a bit easier or look different than with our first since we were basically here alone.

There really is no right or wrong way to nest. Maybe you wont even find yourself nesting at all! For me I didn’t really think about it at the time that I was nesting until it actually was done and over with and even a few friends pointed it out! Whenever you do, if you do notice you have this little burst of energy I would for sure use this moment to the full potential for things you might have put off til closer to the birth! I know that is what I will be doing, and Ill be updating you all on if or when I notice my second pregnancy nesting and what I have done if anything differently than my first!

Did you know when you were in the nesting period?
Did your spouse notice that this was what was happening to you as it was happening?
What kind of things did you do when you were nesting?

Let me know in the comments below! Maybe we had somethings in common!


Confessions of a Realist

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If you want to know the true definition of Realist here it is:

That was taken directly off of google by simply typing in “Define Realist”

And if you haven’t already gathered based on these posts and blogs that I am in fact a realist. I can be pretty blunt I can be pretty rough around the edges, and I can have have a strong opinion also too. Here are some of the confessions that I have for being a Realist.

I can come off extremely blunt. Part of this reason is because I am blunt I guess you could say. I dont believe that I should be sugar coating things when it comes to my opinion. The only time I will end up sugar coating things is MAYBE when I am talking to my grandmother, who is over the age of 80 and well, sometimes sugar coating things can be a little bit easier than the reality of it all. I think when it comes to giving my opinion, giving it bluntly or thinking about it realistically is the best way. Obviously I won’t be as harsh if someone was asking me about whether or not an outfit looked good on them. I would be honest but in a kind way, and not in the white lie tell them it looks good sort of way either. I have the strong believe that if a person is coming to your for your opinion it really is in the best interest to give it to them straight, even if they don’t like the answer that you have said.

Which comes to the next point, Friends sometimes come and go because they cannot handle the truth when it comes to being a realist. I am honest and I am logical with opinions and when it comes to viewing things (Most times because we all know that people also can think on their feet and want to have things done right away even if it is not the best ideas..). Friends sometimes ask for opinions and when you give it to them straight they aren’t sure how to react or are not willing to except an opinion even if it sounds harsh. Most times, as a realist my intentions are not to be mean or hateful. Someone asks my opinion, I give it to them, they are unable to handle it, and thus starts some mini war between friends where one gets a bit snotty and aggressive towards me. Which then, I have to explain what I meant though normally the statement “If you couldn’t handle the truth why ask?” comes out. This is especially true among friends who are discussing relationships. Someone is in maybe a crummy relationship, They ask their friends for an opinion even though they know they are not going to like the response, and then they go back to ignoring the opinion and letting it happen until they are actually ready to end the relationship and then they comment about how you were right all along.

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Not everything is bad when it comes to being a realist. I know that I have been told I am a realist and thanked many times for giving my opinion on things. Sometimes friends or family see things in the worst light possible. As a realist, I sometimes also give a positive spin on to a problem also. Again, sometimes people don’t want to hear a positive spin on something because they want to wallow in self pity and look at the situation as a bit problem but that isn’t always the case. There can be a positive outcome if you only look for it. Though I will have to admit, there are many times that I find myself trying to look at my own problems this way but struggle with seeing it that way. Normally I will ask my boyfriend who I would say is also a realistic to some extent who gives it to me straight and normally I also do not like what he has to say because it disagrees with what I have to say. But I get over that pretty fast (Sometimes anyways!)

I dont think there is enough realist in the world today. I think we are in a world where people would rather have everything sugar coated and brushed over so that when a real trauma happens they are unable to cope with them. People are willing to be “people pleasers” and by doing so they are harming others because they are living in this fantasy world. Not everything is rainbows and roses, in fact it rarely is! If there were more realist in the world I think people would be more able to cope with stressful situations like being declined a job interview, rejection from a relationship or friendship, tough financial decisions they might face also. When we caudal people through their entire life they believe that nothing bad will happen. Giving someone a realistic approach will better help children grow up also (In my opinion). Maybe that is why my mom always asked us “If we were bleeding or on fire” When we would call her at work for stupid things we wanted to do which we knew we were more likely allowed or not allowed to do but we still wanted to put her on the spot anyways.

I know for me, I will never stop being a realist. If people don’t accept that about me, well than they don’t. But I refuse to believe that I should change my way of thinking to please people. Not to mention, I am way to old to be playing games with people. If you are prepared to have an honest answer, I welcome anyone to ask anything to me. If not, well, don’t ask!

Do you consider yourself to be a realist?

Or are you someone who tends to sugar coat everything when asked different questions or your opinion?

Let me know in the comments below, I am curious to see just how many realists there is here!

Why Having a “Date Night” is Important

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Before my son was born, my boyfriend and I would go out for the occasional date nights, here and there of course. We did the normal pre-covid dating and pre-kid date nights like going to dinner and a movie, exploring different parts of the city, grabbing ice cream or going for walks in the parks. Since covid happened obviously that had drastically changed as well as the fact that we had a newborn at the time too. And family were not exactly close even if we wanted to.

When having a child, if you do have one already or are thinking about it, it really can change a relationship. Completely. I even talk about it so much in this particular post here. And no, not everything is pretty and nice when you have a baby now entering a relationship either.

My boyfriend and I are both gamers. We like to game. Sometimes we even game on different times and that is okay also too. During covid especially, and not being able to leave the house, things can be challenging to keep it simple. Sometimes we are in the same space for so long we get on one another nerves, sometimes we are in the best moods, and other times we just want to spend time together. The problem we were having was with different gaming times and taking care of our little baby, we were finding ourselves arguing about date nights. Sure, we never were able to go out in the non-conventional way, we were stuck inside. But that didnt make it any less important to me and to him to want to spend time together with one another. Eventually we decided on having an official date night!

In the beginning we had to play around with different days during the week to see what fit for us. It can be any day that you choose but for us we choose Saturdays. This was a weekend and a day he would not be working or the following day. Doing it through the week was challenging because he works and it can be tiring to stay up especially when I also had to get up with the baby the next day and take care of him all day, being tired does not help that situation either! Saturdays just eventually worked out for us in the end.

Now what do we do? Sometimes nothing. Sometimes we watch movies, binge a TV series that we are enjoying, sometimes we sit out on the deck and listen to music with the lights around just taking in the outdoors. Once we move it will be a much welcomed time for us to sit by the fire outside once we build a fire pit of course and if there is no fire ban also too! This is our time to really just spend time together. Sometimes I will get special candies or treats to make it a big event, Sometimes I will pick up chips or candy that are new and neither of us have tried because I think it will be a good idea for us to experiment together. Just silly little things. Sometimes we even put on a mindless show we don’t really have to focus on and we both sit on our phones showing one another meme’s or funny posts. Just different things that we like to do and together.

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Date night is important to us especially while having a baby and during covid because at the end of the day we are always putting our son first. We take care of him, we play with him, feed him, we bathe him. Everything is about him. Not to say it would every change and now with a second and hopefully in a few years a third along the way, our children will always be first for us. However, it is very important in a relationship to remember why we are their. That is, we both care and adore one another (Even if I can be a bit rough around the edges with attitude!) and it is important to us to remember that. We want to be able to just relax for a few hours and just do “us” for a little while. Mind you, once we are home and what not we may do a few occasional actual going out dates where we go out of the house to a movie or dinner. Since we will have my parents or sister who would be able to babysit though we obviously do not want to take advantage of that! It still will be nice to occasionally go out to restaurants that we frequented enough to know what our favorite meals and desserts at them is! From going to a place for their white chocolate brownie, or a spot with the best fries and chicken fingers around! There really is any possibility to different things that we could do for a date night and we cannot wait to just be back home again either.

Date night’s do not need to be expensive. Like I mentioned, sometimes we just watch TV shows we have been binging and get fully into it together. Other times we order food when my son is asleep, and others times we sit outside enjoying the peace and quiet. Things do not need to be expensive. If you find yourself slipping out of your relationship, even before a baby or after, ask yourself, are we really spending time together as a couple? Do we need to get back to basics? Sometimes doing a simple gesture of picking up your spouses favorite treat and surprising them is just the thing you need to be able to get back to how you truly feel. Life can be busy with and without children and sometimes you just have to get back to what happened before life took over!

What do you do for date night (If you have one already!)?

Do you do anything special or the same every week?

Let me know in the comments below, Maybe I can adapt to some of the ones you do for my own date nights!

The Struggles of Having a Toddler and Becoming Pregnant Again

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Being pregnant is a wonderful thing. Even if you have to get past the whole nausea and exhausted feeling. Then, comes another decision, will I have another child or stick to one. Having one child is a lot for someone who has no idea what they are doing or who has never been around kids before. Deciding to have another child while already having one can be overwhelming to say the least! Welp let’s tall about things that I found hard being pregnant and having a son who was just over a year old when we found out we were expecting again!

Expect to be tired. I think this goes without saying even when you are not pregnant and have a child. You will be even more tired. My first pregnancy when I was tired I went to nap whenever I wanted as it was summer and I wasn’t in school. With already having a child you do not have that luxury any more. I was very lucky because when I was feeling exhausted I would nap if my boyfriend was off work foe the afternoon or whenever. That way he could watch my son. Another thing I tried to do was as soon as my son went foe a nap I would go to bed and nap also. That being said, normally as would Murphys law be, when I was the most tired I would try this and they would be the days that my son would have the roughest sleep and wake up every half an hour so I would feel even worse! Being tired is part of pregnancy but having a one year old or even under 2 year old can make you feel that much more tired!

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An important thing I would recommended for with a young child even when not pregnant would be a play pen. This has saved me on more than one occasion. Babies and toddlers are fast. If I needed to run to the bathroom, felt nauseous, switch laundry, prep baby food or meals, this is a great way to know your toddler is safe when you cant be there. With a baby you can put them in a bassinet and work around when they are sleeping. With a toddler it really isn’t that simple. Especially when they drop to one nap a day and only sleep for a few hours. And before you say “Just go to bed earlier and it will help” remember in early pregnancy the amount of times you get up to use the washroom during the run of a night can be a lot. So even if you go to bed early you still are not sleeping soundly by any means!

Another struggle is your body can feel way more sore than you are used to. Maybe this is because I am out of shape and have been most of my life. But chasing around a toddler has really amplified that! In particular I tend to sit on the floor, on a pillow of course, to play with my son. By the end of the day I fi d myself taking a warm bath or warm shower and letting the water run down my lower back. We do go for walks from.time to time depending on the weather which does help. But know taking care of a first child while growing another one can be challenging. One thing my doctor said I was able to use was athletic gel. The kind that is simply menthol that I put on my lower back normally before bed. This ia not to be confused with brands like rub A535 or even brand similar. Just the normal cheap gel that cools and warms. It does help for sure.

And lastly, a struggle that can be hard but easy to overcome, finding balance! Trying to keep a routine with a toddler while being pregnant and dealing with the morning sickness, food aversions to smells, and exhaustion also too. It is okay for you to skip the dishes for one night. It is alright if you go to bed as soon as your toddler does. Leave that laundry I’m the basket for a day or two. Finding a balance can be hard and we often feel bad about skipping tasks. I am guilty of this myself. I have to remind myself that I am not a super hero and there is only so much that I can do. It is okay to put something off if you need to. Just keeping your son or daughter safe and happy while I’m early pregnancy can take a lot out of you to begin with. Don’t push yourself to the max or you will be feeling worse than you were before!

Regardless of how many kids you have or their ages, being pregnant while already having a child can be tough. Even for the most seasoned woman. Mostly due to the fact that every pregnancy is different. And you have no idea how it will effect you at the end of the day. As I mentioned before, when I was pregnant with my son things were pretty normal and easy going. Now with this child I am noticing myself wanting to catch up on sleep more, not eating as much and being sensitive to smells. Thankfully my nausea happened towards supper time when my boyfriend was home and could take over. No matter what, you are doing a great job even if you feel like you are slacking! We are our own worst enemies. No one is judging us but ourselves and sometimes we are the hardest critics. Keep going! And hopefully you find yourself in my shoes with a bit easier second semester !

Have you been pregnant with a toddler?

What was something you found difficult to balance by already being a mom and wanting to expand your growing family?

Let me know in the comments below! I would love to hear your success stories (or struggles) if you wish!

3 Things I Would I Tell My Younger Self

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Looking back at when I was a teenager in particular, I can say that I was legit a rotten kid. I was combative with my parents, I tend to have been rude more often than not and I felt like they were out to get me. Not that I am 30, have a son and another child due towards the end of 2021, it really has given me some perspective that I didn’t think I would have if you had asked me as a teenager. Here are 3 things that I wish I could tell my younger self.

Number 1 : Your parents are not the enemy. Growing up I would say my parents were leaning more towards strict. We, meaning my siblings and I grew up in the era without cell phones til we could pay for them, and to follow the street lights. In high school we we not allowed out past 10-11pm depending if there was things we were doing and we had to check in regularly if possible too. Even though we were secretive with things as most teens are, we still had a pretty good means of communication though. I felt like my parents were the people who would do things just so I wasn’t having any fun when looking back now it really wasn’t. I know my sister mentioned this before and she agrees. There is a reason why we had to be in specific times, why is this you might ask? Because there really is nothing out here after 1030pm that is for teenagers. Not only that but a lot of times when I would hear my friends who had parents who really did not care what they did and were out all hours of the night, they often were the ones who would be getting in trouble with multiple people and in multiple places. So I guess by them being more strict than some of my friends at the time they really were doing us a favor.

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Number 2: Do better in school! I know this probably comes as no surprise but for me it was something I put on the back burner and really did not focus on. I was too busy smoking cigarettes and hanging out with the stoners.. maybe partaking in that as well, to be bothered with good grades. The funny part in all this was I never missed more than 4 classes. I always was there so that I could get exempt from exams we were allowed to miss. I wish I could tell myself to focus more on grades both in high school and collage because it may have helped a lot more when trying to apply. I went to community collage and while nothing is wrong with that, looking back I wish I had some sort of honors in school. I was just scrapping the bottom of the barrel to get by that I never really thought grades were that big of a deal. I wish I had even applied for scholarships or put some effort to maybe help myself financially by achieving good grades or even by just applying for things. I know that I failed chemistry and advanced math in my first year but I think if I had not of gotten lost in the mix of weed and wanting to look cool than maybe at the end of the day I would have been able to go to a university easier instead of collage.

Number 3: It does get better. I know this may seem like it never will but it does get better. When I was in high school everyone liked me. I could be everyone friend. I was however, never close with people. Coming right out of high school and into collage I was in an abusive relationship. It felt never ending and it felt like I was essentially trapped there for all of eternity. I wasn’t Fast forward to now, I am a 30+ year old women, with a solid relationship of almost 11 years, one son and another baby on the way. Things DO get better. The friends i made in high school who I was really close with which is not a lot, we still talk semi regularly. However a lot of people I am close with are from collage or even just friends from before high school and things. Even friends that I made from work are still around. You do not need to jump through hoops in order to feel secure. At the end of the day being popular in high school or collage does nothing for you as far as a career goes. It might help with social skills but other than that it wont get you good grades, or promotions, or job interviews. You get those on your own. And even if you are the bullied kid or you are feeling like you are lost without a specific clique to belong to, that wont matter when you are 20, or when you are 25, or when you are 30. You will find your people or they will find you and when you find them you just know.

Those would be the three things that I would tell my younger self. Im sure the longer I sit here the more things I would be able to write about what I would say. Not to mention if I was to write this in another 10 or so years I would assume that there would be more or different points that I would want to tell myself also. Everyone I am sure has something that they would tell their teenage selves. Even if it was just to let them know that everything is going to be okay!

Do you have similar things that you would want to tell your younger self?
Is there anything that you did as a teenager that was risky and are surprised that you are still kicking now?
Is your life in the spot where you expected it to be after all these years?

Let me know in the comments below!


5 Pregnancy Myths

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When it comes to pregnancy there is a lot of evidence and old wives tales out there that if someone who may be trying to get pregnant a while, will be willing to try. A lot od them are just made up and something fun to try but they really have no evidence that they worth other than the rare times it might be correct in a prediction. Some of these idea’s I have even seen on an app I use which is wild that people believe this. Especially when logically it really does not make sense if it did work. These of course are just a handful that I have seen throughout reading and research in the topic. I am sure there are many many more like the ring or needle on a string and whichever way it moves predicts the sex of the baby, of so they say.  Let’s dive in!

Apparently you are unable to prevent stretch marks. A lot has to do with genetics and another part has to do with just the weight and how it is distributed. That being said you are totally able to help your skin and growing belly by using creams to help hydrate it. But chances are there is no prevention to this and regardless of method you will more often than not be getting stretch marks if it was meant to be. That isn’t also to say you shouldn’t be hydrating your tummy as it grows to house a little person either! If you have dry skin like myself you will fins it useful in relieving itchiness as well which is common when you are growing to be 3 and 4 sizes bigger than you would expect!

This is one that I have seen a lot on my app. A lot of people seem to think this particular lube “pre-seed” is used in order to help fertility. That is false. Lube does not do anything but help sperm travel to where they are going. It does not impact the quality, speed, distance, count or anything else it simply makes a wet environment foe them to swim up. That being said, if you do not need lube and produce enough moisture down there, there is absolutely no reason why you should be using lube. Most lubes will say they are sperm safe. Meaning they are safe and will not harm sperm once they are inside of it. There is a big difference between being sperm safe and essentially helping fertility. Don’t you think if a lube helped fertility most would be talking about it or trying that route instead of other more invasive methods? Probably eh, which is why if you see any type of lube boasting to help fertility there is a huge chance that it might be a scam and it only is indicating that it is safe to use with sperm.

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One myth that reminds me every time I see it because in the TV show Mike and Molly she was doing this when they were trying to have a baby, it is the holding your legs up method after intercourse so that you help the sperm and gravity keep them inside. This does not help chances what-so-ever. It is completely unnecessary due to the fact that when sperm are released they are already going to where they need to be. Not to mention, the leaking of some sperm our of the body is normally dead sperm. Doing this will not help you get pregnant faster.

This is probably one of the wildest things I have ever seen on an app. It was someone commenting that after intercourse they put in a diva cup. You know the same thing women use for their periods to catch blood. Well they did this and were using it after intercourse. They swore this was increasing their chances of sperm getting in by holding them closer to the cervix  which doesn’t make sense. The diva cup is there to hold blood as if comes out of the body. Not to mention they really do not go THAT deep up to the cervix in order to hold sperm closer. Also in case you didn’t know, the walls of the vagina are ribbed. This is so sperm can make their way up even if some get lost in the tiny folds. A diva cup is a slick piece of rubber. Sperm will not be swimming up it. This obviously was a post about desperation but it really has no value in helping pregnancy. Again, sperm will get to where they need to go without being held into place.

One might think that pregnancy tests that claim to be accurate or can detect pregnancy days before a missed period are great. Well they are not. Though they do claim go be able to detect pregnancy some up to 6 days before a missed period. That may be true however if you actually look at the percent that is accurate it is nearly 65%. Obviously as the days go closer to your period it becomes more accurate however this is heavily because the pregnancy hormone is doubling every 24-48 hours making it easily detectable. The only time a test can be 100% accurate is day of missed period. However it is not uncommon to not get a pregnant sign until after missed period even so much as a week. Another part to this not many people may be aware of is that digital pregnancy tests typically take more of the hormone to produce an accurate/pregnant test. So taking it earlier would mean that it is could give a negative. There is no rush to take a test either, the earlier you test the higher chance of getting a negative when it will become a positive, and seeing that result can be devastating to some. Patience is key here!

Is there anything you heard from old wives tales that came out true but only by chance?

What is something you tried to find out it was inaccurate?

Let me know some crazy myths that you have heard in the comments below!